Fighting a New World

47

Callum's POV

All of this fucking sucked.

Ryder's mom being sick was bad enough but Jax's dad getting us in a custody battle was on a whole other level.

Ryder seemed to be taking the news of his mom well now that she was getting stronger. I think we were all a bit skeptical about her pulling through when we first got the news but since she is feeling better, we've all been able to take a relaxing breath.

That nice breath only lasted for a few seconds though. We had a few days at the most before Andrew and Patrick ruined everything by giving us that news and ever since then, things have been tense again to say the least.

Jax was a mess. The confident, sarcastic, glaring boyfriend I knew so well was reduced to nothing but a bundle of anxiety. He was sent home from work yesterday after having a panic attack and the second he back he went to the shower and stayed in there for a good 45 minutes.

We were back at square one but I think it's worse this time.

At least back at camp he tried to keep up the confident and sarcastic side of him but now he mostly stayed blank. He still cuddled and was affectionate, if anything he became clingier than before but now he did it numbly.

Carter was almost the exact opposite. He stayed up front more often now so Jax could relax. He was more positive now, he didn't glare nearly as much, he stayed off of the punching bag, and he's managed to fight off a few of his own attacks.

If it had been under any other circumstances I would be proud of him but we could all tell it was just an act.

He was putting on the confident and happy face for Jax's sake but I had a feeling that this was going to get to him if he didn't let it out soon.

He's been neglecting his own grief just to make Jax feel better and he as starting to suffer. The happy face was beginning to slip off little by little.

It has only been a few days since the news but I could tell it was already taking its toll on them.

We have less than a week now to prepare for the court hearing but if things didn't change soon I'm not sure they would be mentally strong enough to handle the court date.

I shook my head from the thoughts as I pulled Jax closer.

We were both lying down on the couch while the animal channel played in the back ground for Carter.

Jax lay on my chest while my arms wrapped around his back loosely. He honestly seemed close to being asleep at this point as I lazily played with hair.

Normally I wouldn't mind, mostly because I don't think he's been sleeping well lately, but I'm pretty sure he was supposed to meet with Jem's lawyer at some point today. If I had known what time he had to leave I still would have let him but since I didn't know, I figured I'd just let him be grumpy if that's what it took.

"Babe," I mumbled as my hand paused. "Don't go to sleep. You have things to do in a few hours."

He only groaned in annoyance as he shoved his head farther into my chest.

"Don't be like that." I can't help but chuckle at the sight of usual Jax making an appearance. "We can cuddle when you get back."

He groaned again but this time he leaned up so he straddled my stomach. My hands grabbed his hip while he wiped the sleep out of his eyes.

"Will you come with me," he asked, his voice rougher than usual.

"Of course I will."

I would have held his hand through all of these meeting but up until now he's been making us stay away. I think it was mostly so we could be with Ryder and his mom instead but since we were back to living in the apartment, I guess he gave in. It would just be the two of though since Ryder and Liam were still at work.

Jax only nodded as he forced himself off the couch.

"Also, Carter is demanding coffee before we leave," he said as he pulled off his shirt.

"We can make that happen," I said even though I was already missing his warmth.

"I'm about to take a shower if you want to save water and join. I'm only taking a shower though, nothing else. I'm not in the mood."

I smiled at him as I pushed myself off the couch. He had already began to walk away but I grabbed his hips before he could get any farther before turning him around to face me.

He smiles up at me but I could tell it was forced.

"I would love to join you," I said with a smile of my own before allowing my voice to get serious, "but never feel like you need to explain why you don't want sex. That's not how we do things and you know that." He only nods as his face comes closer to mine.

"I love you," he sighed against my lips.

"I love you too. Now onwards to the shower before we run out of time."

His breath tickled my skin as he let out a small chuckle before backing away.

"God you're a dumbass sometimes," he teased as he walked towards the bathroom.

"Yea, but admit it, I'm your dumbass."

"Hell no, you're only mine when you're being cute."

"That's not how this works," I said as I shrugged off my clothes while Jax began heating up the water. "It's all or nothing, you don't get to pick and choose when you want me. So am I you're dumbass or not?"

He over exaggerated a frown as if he were thinking while we stepped into the small shower together.

The frown slowly slipped away as he traced random shapes into my chest while the warm water sprayed down on the two of us. The frown turned into a small smile as he leaned up and connected our lips.

"Then I guess you're mine all the time," he said as he laid his head on my chest again, his fingers never stopping on my skin.

"Good, because you're never getting rid of me."

"Like I would ever want to," he scoffed.

Last updated Augusr 25, 2021