I'll Wait Forever

-12-

We walked in silence for what felt like hours before he stopped suddenly.

"Why did you stop?" I asked.

"Because we're here." He took a few steps forward and I followed suit. I looked past him and saw one of the most beautiful scenes in front of me- a large cliff with a waterfall off to the right side, beautiful floral trees and bushes surrounded the entire place, and there was a pair of doves sitting on a branch just over the cliff. I've always loved doves, if I could be any animal, that's the one I would choose.

"So, why are we here?" I asked rather tentatively.

"You said you haven't been happy in a long while. That reminded me of someone I haven't seen in many years. Someone I loved very much. Someone who said those exact words to me exactly one year before they took their own life. Someone who I vowed to take care of and protect, even if it costed me my own life. And I failed him." I saw a tear stream down Gerard's cheek. But he quickly wiped it away, "That person was my little brother Mikey. He was my whole world. My parents died at a very young age, and my mother's last words to me were 'take care of Mikey. Don't let him get hurt.' And I failed her. I-I fucking let him kill himself! My brother is dead because of me! And I am not going to let that happen to anyone else I care about. You deserve to be fucking happy. I don't care how you feel, or what you're doing with your life, you should be happy. I just wanted him to be happy..." Gerard burst into tears. He broke down, he crumbled to the ground. I knelt down beside him and held him. Gerard clung to me, like I would leave him any second. I felt a single tear stream down my face.

We sat like that for hours. Me just sitting and holding Gerard while the occasional sob overtook his body. By the time he removed his shaking hands from around me, the sky was pitch black. There wasn't a single star out tonight.

"F-Frankie.."

"Yes?

"Let's go home." I nodded and helped him up. We started the long journey back, but I was so tired I didn't think I could make it.

"Gerard, I don't know if I can make it all the way back." I slowed my pace and leaned against a tree.

"C'mon, just a little farther." He coaxed.

"Ok... I'll try- agh!" I tripped over a tree root, "godammit!" I yelled. Gerard came over and picked me up off the ground bridal style.

"I'll carry you the rest of the way. Just sleep, ok?"

"No. I'm too heavy, I can walk..." I suddenly grew very tired. "Ok... And sleep?"

"Just sleep..." He reassured.

I was out in minutes.

---

3rd person P.O.V

Gerard carried Frank for 40 more minutes through the woods and eventually into the spare bedroom. After tucking him in, literally, Gerard went downstairs to have some 'alone time'. He went downstairs and into his kitchen and poured himself a shot of straight vodka.

"I'm sorry Mikes... I-I know you h-hate it when I d-drink... B-but it's the only thing t-that takes away the p-pain..." He poured himself another shot. And another. And another. "A drink for the horror that I'm in... For the good guys and the bad guys... For the monsters that I've been..." A few tears escaped Gerard's eyes. He needed a release.

Gerard went into his bedroom and began to write. He wrote for hours. He wrote until the sun came up and blinded him. He wrote how he truly felt. When he was done, Gerard sang quietly to himself.

"Some say now suffer all the children,
And walk away a savior
Or a madman and polluted
From gutter institutions.
Don't you breathe for me
Undeserving of your sympathy.
Cause there ain't no way that I'm sorry for what I did...

And through it all
How could you cry
For me?
'Cause I don't feel bad about it.
So shut your eyes
Kiss me goodbye
And sleep,
Just sleep...

The hardest part is letting go of your dreams...

A drink, for the horror that I'm in
For the good guys and the bad guys
For the monsters that I've been
3 cheers for tyranny
Unapologetic apathy
'Cause there ain't no way that I'm coming back again

And through it all
How could you cry
For me?
'Cause I don't feel bad about it...
Just shut your eyes,
Kiss me goodbye,
And sleep...

The hardest part's the awful things that I've seen...

(Sometimes I see flames, and sometimes I see the people that I love dying..)

Just sleep, just sleep, just sleep, just sleep, just sleep, just sleep...

Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

And I can't... I can't ever wake up..."

Gerard finished his song and sat back in his chair.

"That was really beautiful." He heard a voice whisper from the doorway. Of course, he knew Frank was there all along. He wanted him to hear it. To know what a monster Gerard was so he had a chance to escape it. But, Frank being the stubborn little shit he was, he would choose to ignore it. Gerard was grateful for that, even if he knew it would lead to Franks eventual demise. But, he would try his best to prevent that from happening. Gerard had failed once, but he would not let it happen again.

***

Kind of a longer chapter... And I tried 3rd person pov for the first time (it was shitty, I know.) so yeah. I hope you liked it- comments and votes would be greatly appreciated...

Also- today is a rough day for the MCRmy... As you probably know, it has been exactly 2 years. I hope you are all doing okay, I know it's hard for all of us. Just say strong, carry on, never let them take the light behind you eyes, don't let them take you alive, and, most importantly, remember, it's not a band- it's an idea. And the best fucking one the world has ever seen. It will live on forever in our hearts.

As for me- you really need to listen to me, because I'm telling you the truth, I mean this, I'm okay! (Trust me) *bursts into tears*

merci pour le venin...