Truth Doesn't Change The Way You Lie (A Bucky Barnes x OC story)

Chapter 18

The following morning Bucky had woken up before Amelia. She kept moving around in her sleep, mumbling small nonsense and frowning, as if she was talking to someone. Bucky lay there facing her, watching her motions as she twitched. He placed his arm around her side, calming her down, his fingers under her top tracing her back. Now that he was awake of her scars, he couldn't help but notice them, wondering how he had missed them previously. Bucky couldn't understand how someone could do such a thing, especially because she was a child at the time. His fingertips glided over the raised skin, making think about his own marks.

Amelia's eyes fluttered as they opened, adjusting to the light. She smiled softly at him, loving how he was the first thing she saw in the morning. "How long have you been awake?" She yawned.

"Not long, don't worry." Bucky pulled her closer and left a gentle kiss on her forehead. She could feel his hand still pressed against her back, against her scars. She held his hand and turned over so that he was spooning her, their hands under her pillow. "You kept mumbling in your sleep, which was adorable by the way" Bucky moved a strand of her hair behind her ear, and leaned over to kiss her cheek, making her blush. "What were you dreaming about?"

Amelia's whole body tensed up, "Oh, it was just a bad dream, nothing really" She tried brushing it off, but in reality she had remembered something from her past. Something that she had repressed.

"Was it because of last night? Because you told told me what happened?" He lent his hand agains her back, rubbing his thumb a round, feeling the bumps from on top of her shirt. Amelia turned over to face him again, her tear ducts beginning to swell. "It's nothing to be ashamed of, you know. I have scars too. Not just the ones from my arm." He moved the sheet down to reveal his leg. "See this one?" He pointed to his knee. "This is because one time me and Steve missed our bus, so we had to walk home in the dark." Amelia listened as he rambled on. "Anyway, he tripped me up and I fell into a thorn bush, I had to have 3 stitches in it" Bucky laughed trying to comfort her.

Amelia laughed as she pictured a very skinny Steve tripping up a 6ft tall Bucky. "It's not about the marks on my back..." her smile faded.

"Then what? You know you can tell me" Bucky grew concerned.

Amelia picked the skin by her nails, feeling anxious about telling him. Not knowing how he would react to another horror from her past. "It was about this foster family I lived with for a while..."

"The same ones that did that to you?" He questioned, moving his hand over her back once again.

"No," she smiled sweetly, "This family was kind. I thought they could really be my forever family, you know." She snuggled down on to Bucky's chest and he wrapped his arm around her, comforting her as she talked.

"So... what happened?" Bucky stroked his hand through her hair.

Amelia took a big sigh before carrying on. "This couple already had a son of their own, Patrick, he was 5 at the time, but they wanted another child. We all connected instantly, it was only a couple weeks before I was living with them."

"Wait, so how old were you?"

"I was uh..." Amelia had to think, digging through the repressed memory. "I was 7 when they first fostered me." Amelia's voice started to crack as she became emotional, thinking back about the accident. "Me and Patrick were playing in the park one afternoon. His parents were distracted, talking to one of their friends. We were playing on the monkey bars and he fell off..." She could feel a lump in her through as she talked. "I went down to help him, but as I grabbed his hand..." She hesitated, being unable to say out loud what happened.

"Amelia, you don't have to say what happened. It's okay." Bucky squeezed her arm gently, calming her down.

"No, I need to. I need to say what happened. Even if it's just for myself." She composed her self, taking another deep breath, steadying her nerves. "I saw in his head. It was different though, it was like I was controlling him. But when I snapped out of it..." Her jaw clenched, "it was too late. He was just lying on the floor. lifeless. I..." She stumbled over her words.

"Amelia..."

"I couldn't do anything. I screamed out for his parents and they came running over, pushing me to one side. Just holding his limp body in their arms" she held back her tears.

"That was just in your dream though, right?" Amelia could feel his heart beating as she lay on his chest. "Amelia...?"

She sat up with her back turned to him. "I killed him Buck." Her voice stung with her regret. "I actually killed him. I killed Patrick." Bucky didn't know how to respond, he just sat there silently. "After that, his parents couldn't look at me. They send me back to the kids home...Everyone was scared of me after they found out what happened. I was the freak of that place, no one wanted to even look at me for the rest of my time there. And let me tell you, it was a lonely ten years after that."

Bucky put his arms around her and pulled her back down into his chest, stoking her hair as she bawled her eyes out. The sound of her whimpers made his heart shatter, but he had to stay strong for her. "It's okay, Doll. We've all done terrible things that we couldn't control." He softly shushed to her, keeping his chin rested on her head.

The two of them laid in bed, cuddled up together for a while, Amelia still feeling fragile. Bucky peered over to his bedside table, noticing the time. "Hey, Doll, we need to get up now." He slowly sat them both up. He ran his hand through Amelia's hair and left his hand on her cheek. "Are you gonna be okay?" He looked into her bloodshot eyes.

"I'll be fine." She smiled falsely, "I think I'll go take a shower, freshen up a bit before my flight." She took his hand and gave it a gentle kiss, before getting out of bed and heading to the bathroom. Bucky gathered the rest of her things from around the room before getting dressed. He looked through her bag and found some comfy clothes for her to wear for the flight. He picked out some grey sweatpants as well as a black tank top, he also chose one of his pale blue zip up hoodies as he thought it would help comfort her.

Amelia stepped out the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her, her wet hair sticking to her shoulders. "Wow, are you really that eager for me to leave?" She joked seeing all her things ready.

"Oh c'mon, you know id love you to stay here forever." He grinned opening a draw and pulling out a red button up shirt and some jeans. Amelia grabbed the clothes that Bucky had put on the bed and began to get changed, facing away from Bucky. She still hadn't become completely comfortable with the idea of him seeing her naked, but Bucky respected that and looked away, him also getting changed in the process.

Bucky loaded Amelia's bags into his car as he waited for her to finish drying her hair.  He wandered back up to his apartment and stood in the main doorway, leaning on the frame with one arm. His gaze focused on Amelia as she tied her hair back in the mirror. She dawdled over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, looking up at him. "God, I'm gonna miss you!" He swung his arms around her, holding her so tight she could barely breath.

"I'm gonna miss you too." Her heart sank, seeing him get emotional over her. "Come on, we've got to head off." She said, fighting off her tears.

The whole drive to the airport Bucky had kept his hand on Amelia's inner thigh, giving it a squeeze every now and then. He carried her bags and followed her into the airport as far as he could, before the security stop. He placed her bags by his feet before pulling her to one side, holding her in by her petite waist. His face became serious, "Doll, promise me something?" he pondered.

"What is it?" She stared up at him.

"Just- Just promise me you won't forget about me. About us." His eyes grew sad, knowing that he couldn't say when they would next meet.

Amelia placed her tiny palm on the side of his face. "James Barnes, I could never forget about you." She bit her lip, almost chocking on her words, not wanting to leave his side. Bucky hooked his fingers in the elastic waistband of her bottoms and pulled her as close as he possibly could. Their lips collided, not caring if people saw them. In their minds it was just the two of them. He rested his forehead on hers after the passionate kiss, both of their eyes still closed, savouring the moment. "I fucking love you Amelia, you know that right?"

"Of course you big softy, I love you too."