The One That Wasn't || Loki

Chapter 3: Questioning Everything

"Two birds on a wire
One tries to fly away and the other
Watches him close from that wire
He says he wants to as well, but he is a liar"

-

Loki had been lied to all his life. He was a relic, taken away from where he really belonged. His thoughts took over his mind to that one moment where the cold engulfed him. This was why, maybe, he had proposed to Cordelia before he could confirm his suspicions. Would she take him if she found out that he was a monster? A monster that deserved to die for what he was?

He stared at his hand, still remembering how it became blue. The look on the Frost Giant's face when he realised that Loki didn't know who he was was haunting him before his eyes. He wasn't the God of Trickery anymore. That was well taken care of by his parents, if that's what they ever considered themselves to be.

Loki tried to use his magic to let go of the illusion that was making him look pale....like an Asgardian, which he wasn't. How could he have survived all this while anyway? Something was blocking his enchantments and he could only think of one person whose powers were stronger than his own.

"How did the guard even know?"

"I told him," said Loki.

He heard the poison in his own voice, and for the first time in his life, he was glad that Cordelia wasn't with him. She couldn't see him this way, no matter what. That's when he thought of something else. What if she knew? What if she knew all along and their relationship was all based on lies? Could his parents have asked Asfrid to let Cordelia into the palace so that she could trick him into being her friend? Loki was bewildered, a sick feeling taking over his stomach. He shouldn't question her motives. But what if it was true?

"What?" Fandral asked.

"I told him to go to Odin after we left. He should be flogged for taking so long. We should never have left for Jotunheim." Maybe then he could have lived up to his name and drowned in the lies that were being fed to him all his life.

"You told the guard?" Volstagg asked.

"I saved our lives. And Thor's."

But once again, the four of them were Thor's friends....not his own. They had never considered him their friend. And why should they? He was born a monster and he was surrounded by deception all along. Why should anyone trust him? They were ungrateful for him having made the right decision. They would have died if it wasn't for him.

"Loki." Sif got off the diwan and walked towards him. Seeing her only made his blood boil. She had been pretending to be the kind one all along just to stab him in the back. "You must go to the Allfather and convince him to change his mind."

Of course, Loki thought. She was going to take Thor's side. Loki wondered if she loved him so much that she was going to deny Thor's decisions that could have gotten them killed. "And if I do, then what? I love Thor more dearly than any of you but you know what he is. He's arrogant, he's reckless, he's dangerous. You saw how he was today. Is that what Asgard needs from its King?"

Loki left before wanting to give them another chance to oppose him. He wouldn't give them any more chances to look down upon him because they can do all that when is not around. It's not like they cared about him anyway.

It's not like anyone did.

He had no one for him.

No family. No friends. And certainly no loved ones.

He was going to have to give them all a payback for this. Every single one of them thought that he was jealous of Thor. But was he? Was he really? Was he the one jealous of the golden boy or was everyone else always disregarding him?

What was the truth?

He had brought the three Jotuns into Asgard. It wouldn't take long for people to figure out that he did it but without Thor, no one could question him. He was the Prince of Asgard. But he didn't have that title anymore.

He was a Frost Giant's son.

He had grown up hating them. He had grown up hating what he actually was. All the tales that he had read taught him to hate who he really was. Odin knew all this when he let Loki believe all this. So had Frigga. How could she do that to Loki? It was one thing to stop Odin from making Thor and Loki compete against each other. But to lie to Loki about who he was? That was a whole new level of betrayal.

⧪

Cordelia had no idea what was going on.

It had been a week since she left Asgard but like she knew before, time on Swetana moved faster than it did on Asgard. It was only a day back there, making her wonder what was going on back home. Her hand kept wanting to fiddle with the ring that should have been on her finger. But she had to listen to Heimdall and keep it safe. After all, it was a family heirloom that Loki decided to trust her with. And how could she betray his trust?

She hoped that he was happy back on Asgard and that Thor didn't tease him too much. She would get her chance at the teasing and she couldn't wait to meet Sif again. She missed bickering with the Warriors but she loved practicing with the Chosen. She learnt a whole lot more when they trained on foreign lands because their swords would change their powers depending on climate and the threat that was around. It was what the Valkyries had used originally. They were the stuff of legends that the Chosen Ones took as inspiration. They were never going to fight against Asgard and were ready to give up their lives if it meant keeping their homeland safe.

But even interstellar travel through the Bifrost had its effects on people. The Chosen were extremely tired when they landed on Swetana and that resulted in taking rests in turns to get used to the different stellar zone.

Cordelia couldn't sleep when her turn came because her mind kept going back to Loki's proposal. She could still recall the exact way he had deceived her. He had tricked her and given her the greatest gift that he could have given her - the possibility of having a family for herself. Being with the Chosen was like having a second family, to have people that she could trust with her life. They would talk all day when they weren't working and every mission that they would go on only brought them closer together.

But a part of her wished she could go on missions with Loki.

Only if she knew what was going on back on Asgard.