DREAM ( COMPLETED )

Finale

Finale.

For me nothing's more important than my career, value and honor.

Love and Marriage.

Those words mean nothing to me. I have never seen myself love more than the love I have for my job. Never in my wildest dream, I dream of marrying someone or give my dedication to someone else.

For me, it was just a headache and I didn’t have time to waste looking for a rock I would just hit on my head.

If I can do it alone, why would I look for a partner.

But that belief changed when I woke up one morning in an unfamiliar room in a country where I had previously stayed because of my job.

"I  need your help"

For the first time I said those words to someone. Hindi ko alam kung at hindi rin ako sigurado kung matutulungan niya ako, but... I was desperate.

"A-are you telling me you're already dead?" Her eyes widened, after I told her what was happening to me that even I could not understand.

And I'm thankful and grateful to her because no matter how surprised she was, she gave me the help I was asking for. Tinulungan at sinamahan niya akong maghanap ng kasagutan sa lahat ng katanungan ko. Pero sadyang napakahirap maghanap..

"What we're gonna do now?"

That's her sad question after we contact one of my friends and still nothings happened.  Nginitian ko lang siya, and even though I was still confused by what was happening I accepted the fact  that maybe I need to start a new life without the things I value the most.

With her. As days and weeks passed by I learned to appreciate the new life I have. The simple things, and most of all I learned something I had not learned before.

"No exact reason why, I just woke up one day falling in love with you!"

Yes. Finally, I fell in love with someone, I finally learned how to love for the very first time but behind my love for her is the fear that I will just leave her one day. Lalo na ng makita mismo ng dalawang mata ko ang unti-unting paglalaho ko.

"I Don't care! I love you Jay. I want to have happy memories with you,
I Don't...I Don't  fucking care of your disappearance someday"

I wanted to punch myself that time when I saw the tears and pain in her eyes after I told her that she could not love me because I would just disappear one day and would just leave her. But I love her and I want her to know and feel it.

With each passing day I had nothing else to ask and pray to God other than for him to extend the time I spent with the woman I love.

For the first time, I felt the fear and apprehension that I would left someone behind. I don't want to leave her, if God just hear me out.  I just want to stay where I am now. I want to stay by her side. I wanted to show her how much I Love her and how grateful I am to know and meet someone like her.

Pero may ibang plano ata para sa aming dalawa si Lord. Dahil nagising nalang ako isang gabi na may kakaibang naramdaman. Kasabay nu'n nakita ko ang muling  paglalaho ng mga kamay ko na tila isa akong computer graphic na naglalaho. I'm slowly fading.

"J-Jay a-are you l-leaving?" She said sobbing. I felt the weakness of her legs because I felt her weight more. "Tell me, are you leaving, iiwan mo na ba ako?"

If I only have a choice I won't and will never leave her. It doesn't matter if I lose everything as  long she's with me. I want to erase the pain she's in because of me but I can't do anything right now than to just watch her crying full of pain as I slowly fading.

Her eyes full of painful tears.
Her sobbing voice.
Her last 'I love you' and 'goodbye'
Her eagerness to touch and hug me again as I slowly fading.. was my last memory with her.

" Jay, Son how are you feeling? are you hurting? Why are you crying?" I looked at my Mother as she intently looking at me the moment I open my eyes. I'm back.

" Mom, where's Sherlaine?" Nakita ko ang kaguluhan sa mga mata ni mommy ng itanong ko iyon. Napapikit nalang ako at pilit na pinakalma ang sarili ko sa lungkot na bumabalot sa akin.

" I wanna see her, Mom." No matter
how hard I tried to hold back  myself from asking about her, I just can't. " Bring her to me please. "

" Okay, okay we will find her " My mom said as she hug me to calm me down.

" Son, isn't she, just part of your dream? We have been looking for her for several months but still nothing." My mom said after I talked to the private investigator i hired to look for Sherlaine.

" She's real, Mom." Tanging nasabi ko.

" A penny for your thoughts Mister Lee?" Naka-ngiting nilingon ko ang asawa ko. It's been years since we first met. Ilang taon na din ang lumipas mula ng muli kaming pinagtagpo at ikinasal pero hanggang ngayon sariwang-sariwa pa sa akin ang lahat.

" Ang mga bata? " kako, matapos ko siyang patakan ng halik sa labi. Agad naman siyang sumimangot na mas ikina-ngiti ko.

" Why?" Painosente kong tanong.

" Magtigil ka Jay, hanggang ngayon masakit pa din ang baba ko dahil sa pinagga-gawa mo kagabi sa akin kaya manahimik ka diyan baka masipa kita."

" But You like it, don't you? " I teasingly said.

" he! " she growled. How cute and adorable can she be. I'm so lucky.

Hinila ko siya palapit sa akin at niyakap ng mahigpit.

" I love you babe "

"I love you  Jay, pero hindi pa din pwede." Natawa nalang ako na agad ding naputol..

"Mom, dad!" We watched as the door to our room opened and our eight -year -old daughter, Kendra Laine, and her twin brother Lorde Drew enter.

" Can we sleep here? "

" Did Lorde tell a scary story again?" I asked. Ewan ko ba naman kasi sa anak kong lalaki. Ang hilig magkwento ng nakakatakot  alam naman niyang matatakutin ang kapatid.

" I didn't, Dad. Amh.. we just want to cuddle with you both."

" Come here babies " Nakangiting ani Sherl. Agad namang sumampa sa kama ang kambal at yumakap sa amin.

"I love you Mom, I love you Dad!" Ani Kendra na sumiksik sa akin. She's a daddy's girl.

" I love you mom and dad " ani  Lorde na nakayakap kay Sherlaine. He's a mommy's boy.

" We love you both! " sabay naming sabi. Parehong puno ng kasiyahan at pagmamahal ang mga puso.

I used to hate the words Love and Marriage before, pero nabago yun ng dahil sa isang panaginip na naging dahilan ng pagtatagpo namin.

Bago pa kami magtagpo madalas ko noong sabihin na kaya kong mag-isa at ng hindi ko kailangan ng makakasama. But after what happened to us. I could only say...

"I had a dream, which was not at all a  dream. And I would rather share one lifetime with her than face all the ages of this world alone."

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Ayun, Final Goodbye na talaga. Once again Thank you so much guis for all the support, for reading and appreciating this story.