I Die Often Hank

Chapter 78: Jumping, Collapsing, and Lying

"WOOOOOOH I FEEL ALIVE!" Erik yelled. 

"Give it a few minutes, it hasn't even hit yet," I added. 

"Speaking off hitting-" A drunk started to say. 

"She will cut off your hand," Erik stated deadpan. 

The man looked horrified and clutched his wrist with one hand while scurrying off like the rat he was. 

Erik grabbed my hand and pulled me to the dancefloor and close to him. We began to dance to the music. Everything was going smoothly then like a truck, all the liquor decided to start to hit us. Erik and I started to uncontrolably giggle like school girls. 

"Erik, you're very pretty," I confessed.

"I know," He replied. 

We continued to dance, with much more energy now. We swayed and twisted to the beat for what seemed like a lifetime. Then it happened. The alcohol hit it's peak in our bloodstreams. Erik however was definitely not at his peak; quite the opposite actually. 

I felt Erik's grip around my waist loosened up considerably. Oh uh. That can't be a good sign. I spun around in his grasp and I saw the far away look in his glossy blue eyes. He started to collapse and I did my best to hold him up. 

"Is he okay?" A bystander asked. 

"He's fine, he'll be fine, he's totally fine," I defended. 

I slowly pulled Erik off of the dance floor. I got us a wall and leaned him up against it. I snapped my fingers in his face and got no response. 

"Erik? Erik!" I spoke trying to get his attention. 

"I don't feel so good..." Erik grumbled. 

"Hmm I wonder why," I teased. 

"Because I'm better than you!" Erik defended. He tried to gesture toward me, but he almost fell over in the process. 

"Not better, just drunker and probably stupider," I responded. 

"I'm not stupid, I'm Erik," Erik stated disproving himself. 

"Okay buddy, time to rest up and sober up," I concluded.

"WHO THE HELL IS SOBER? ARE YOU CHEATING ON HANK!?" Erik yelled out. 

And with that wonderful show of Erik's intelligence he collapsed, yet again. I instantly reached forward and grabbed him. I looked at his face and noticed that this time he was completely knocked out. 

Well shit, there goes my plan of tricking him into doing our jobs. Goes I'll have to babysit the man. Lightweight.

I tried to pull Erik along, but with his loss of consciousness meant the loss of movement in his legs. I bent down and swept him up into my arms bridal style. I stumbled back surprised by how heavy he was. I really need to work out more. I slowly made my way to the elevator and set Erik's limp body against the wall. As soon as I let go he started to slip down towards the floor. 

"Oh shit!" I exclaimed while pulling him back up. 

I pressed the button for the ground floor and tried to figure out what to do with Erik. I leaned myself against the wall and then leaned him into me. I wrapped my arms around his back in a psuedo hug and held him up. 

The elevator slowly made it's way down the buildings may floors before randomly stopping. 

"I swear if I get trapped in an elevator with Erik in this state," I muttered under my breath. 

The doors slid open and several sharply dressed people entered the elevator. They all starred directly at me and Erik. I tried to quickly think of a good lie. 

"Sorry he gets really clingly when he's tired," I lied. 

Everyone gave me a nod and a strange look. The elevator continued to move downward at a painfully slow pace. 

"Charles no," Erik mumbled loud enough for everyone to hear. 

Everyone once again starred at us. 

"Charles is our dog, he's trying to be stricter. I told him he needs practice scolding," I lied. 

Everyone slowly looked away.

"Charles you know I don't like using my powers like this, but I guess I'll an exception tonight," Erik muttered. 

Everyone gave me a wide eyed stare. I tried to think of a lie that made sense. My mind was completely blank. I just looked down at the floor and stayed silent. 

The elevator dinged and I quickly exited with Erik in my arms. I picked him up and started to stumble back to our hotel. Eventually we arrived and I pushed Erik onto the bed. I crawled into the other bed and instantly fell asleep. 

Author's Note:

I don't really have anything to say about the chapter, whoops. 

I'm thinking of trying my hand at smut... thoughts??? I have some sort of smut on Ao3 (same username just a - instead of _)

Fun fact I'm terrified of elevators because fear of heights + fear of confined spaces is very not fun. 

ALSO WE CROSSED 100K WORDS??????