Chapter 5

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When Lan Wangji was given the book in a non-assuming cover but with a very explicit name by Lan Qiren, he did not know what to think of this whole situation. It took him almost two whole hours to come to terms with the realization that while Lan Qiren could not have accepted his and Wei Ying's relationship only a week ago, he was now apparently giving him love advise! Had his uncle been possessed or cursed? Or had it all been a dream and when he would wake up, things would go back to normal?

But it seemed like it was all real. The book he was still clenching in his hands two hours later was the best reminder.

He took a deep breath and opened it on the first page. He closed it again immediately and looked around if anyone had seen the contents. Luckily, there was no one in sight. Lan Wangji exhaled, feeling his ears turn hot. He quickly stood up and retired into an empty study room which was usually used only by the members of the Gusu Lan sect clan, and he locked the door from the inside for a good measure. No one could see him reading something like this! Not even when the book was given to him by one of the elders himself.

He steeled himself and opened the book again, his ears blushing even harder now that he already knew what was inside. It was similar to the time when Wei Wuxian had once pranked him with a porn book so many years ago, yet it was so different at the same time. There were pictures, of course, but those could no longer bother him as they did in the days of his youth. No, it was more the very existence of this particular book and the fact that it came from Lan Qiren which was shocking him speechless.

However, once he actually started to read the first paragraphs, he immediately understood why his uncle would give it to him to study. The whole book was full of description of different techniques and positions one could use in bed, but not exclusively, there were some even more exotic ones as well. He would have never imagined that making love could be this intricate and demand so much preparation.

Each technique was accompanied by an enumeration of advantages and disadvantages for both parties, the one taking and the one being taken; it went without saying that they were all performed between a male couple. Lan Wangji would have never thought that love making could actually be considered an art, but at this point, he could almost believe it.

Why did his uncle have such a book? Lan Wangji would have thought that it would be certainly forbidden in the Cloud Recesses seeing how he had had no idea about the matter until a week ago when Wei Ying explained a few things to him. But oh, was there so much more than his husband had told him!

After finishing the book, his ears burning even a brighter shade of red just as his cheeks, he understood what his uncle wanted to tell him. He had been hurting Wei Ying all this time. Unconsciously and in a good faith but still. The position they had chosen, probably because his husband could not think of any other, had been putting a lot of strain on his back and his whole body in general. The book also mentioned that it could make his partner anxious if he could not see Lan Wangji's face while being taken.

Lan Wangji wanted to cry at that moment, extremely grateful to Lan Qiren for pointing it out to him. He had already known that Wei Ying was in a lot of pain in the mornings but he had never known why, he only ever blamed his lack of a golden core, just as Wei Ying himself. They have never considered that it could have something to do with the way they were doing things.

He was blaming himself for never asking, for never researching about this topic on his own. He should have known that Wei Ying would not tell him anything about his discomfort, especially not if he had thought that Lan Wangji would take the news badly. Or perhaps that it was such a sensitive topic that he did not want to talk about it even between them. After all, his usually chatting and happy-go-lucky husband was always so quiet during their 'every day'. Not that he was silent; Wei Ying was just as loud as usual, moaning sweetly under him in the latter half of their nightly activities, but he never said even a single word.

It really should have been Lan Wangji who should have noticed these things earlier. He should have been the one to take care of and to protect his husband, he had promised. Then again, he had noticed, if only late, but he was not one to easily find his way around with words, with such a delicate topic no less. He had always been better at showing his intentions and feelings via actions.

While it would perhaps be better to initiate a conversation with his husband tonight, he decided that he would first try to show him his love and concern in another way.

He opened the book again and found the perfect position which would not put so much pressure on Wei Ying's hips and would let him see Lan Wangji the whole time. It was the least he should do to pamper his husband. He read the description carefully, burning every word into his memory so he would not find himself at a loss once it would be time to act.

He was also determined to be more careful and slower in his approach than usual. As soon as he took his forehead ribbon down, he often found himself letting go of his self-restraint too quickly and too violently. He did not want to hurt Wei Ying anymore. His husband had already had too much to bear even without Lan Wangji adding to the burden. He should be pampered and cared for for the rest of his life, never again encountering any difficulties or pain.

With the plan for tonight taking shape in his mind, he stood up from his seat and carefully hid the book in the folds of his robes. He could not let anyone see it. His uncle had not said he wanted the book back so Lan Wangji decided to keep it for a little bit longer, he could certainly use the reference if ever his plan would not work.

Taking a few deep breaths to chase away his blushing, he unlocked the door and headed to the kitchens to procure dinner for himself and his husband. 

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