maple syrup | remus lupin [1]

48. the map

She also hated the fact that she seemed to be the only one to actually care about what was happening between the four.

It was a pattern in Claudia's life that people left. Her mum left, her aunt left, and with them left all of their family members. So now, as the girls slowly started to leave as well without a single reasoning, Claudia was experiencing her biggest fear.

Watching people disappear.

But, she was sick of moping and dwelling over it. Maybe it was just in her head, maybe they were all just incredibly busy with their own lives, so busy that it just became a little harder to talk and laugh again.

So, instead of staring at her ceiling and questioning what the hell was going on, she strutted down the stairs to the Ravenclaw common room, and there she found Mary Johnson, someone she hadn't spoken to in a long time.

"Watcha reading?" The brunette girl asked the smaller girl, who was seated in the couch leaned against the armrest with a book bigger than her head covering her face.

Mary merely peeked her eyes out from the top of the book, and then she made the decision to not answer her.

"Mary? Is something wrong?"

"No."

"Are you sure? Because-"

"I'm just surprised to find you talking to me is all," she shrugged as she placed the book down on her lap. "I thought you had stopped doing that."

"Oh," Claudia breathed as she sat down by Mary's feet. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, you should be."

"It's just...I haven't really been talking to anyone," Claudia explained, not mentioning the boys who seemed to be a very exclusive exception. "I've been avoiding plenty of people, trust me."

"Why?" The twelve year old asked.

"It's confusing," Claudia sighed.

"Then explain. I've got time," Mary pressed. "And besides, I've missed you. A lot. You were like the big sister I never had."

Claudia softened at that. She missed Mary, she really did. She missed Lily too, and the small encounters she had had with Marlene made her miss her too. And her classmates in Ravenclaw who were muggleborns and halfbloods. Yeah, she missed them all.

She didn't understand herself sometimes. She had managed to find a way to spend time with the Marauders, so why couldn't she do it with anybody else?

The answer was that Claudia was terrified. The threat that the people she would associate herself with could end up like her mother terrified her every day. She still heard it coming out of Nolan's mouth whenever she heard James laugh, saw Peter eat candy, heard Sirius' favourite songs and saw Remus' gorgeous face.

She was terrified, and nothing could change that. All she could do was take baby steps. And maybe it was time for another step, because there were places were her last name and blood didn't matter.

"I've missed you too, Mary," Claudia said with a small smile. "You're like the little sister I never had."

"So, if you missed me...explain."