Trying To Forget (A Law And Order: SVU Fanfic)

Chapter 32: Something Old, Something New...

The afternoon sun slowly inched out from behind her sun visor as she changed lanes to exit the highway. It was only 16 minutes after their 5 pm meet-up and the diner was only a few blocks away, but she felt bad nonetheless. She'd had a good reason, as usual—a development in a case—but it didn't make her feel any less annoyed because she'd planned on leaving early and being on time, gladly taking Amanda's "offer" to cover her last few hours of her daytime shift as well as her on-call shift.

She found it laughable at this point that she was still even on the roster as she'd given up on trying to battle for inclusion and instead chose to relinquish the duty wilfully. The decision hadn't all been about pride though because as much as she hated to admit it, as the weeks went on, she was getting increasingly fatigued earlier in the day, making it impossible to even be alert after the sun went down.

Work was harder, staying awake long enough to enjoy the sporadic moments with Elliot at night was harder...staying awake in general was harder. Elliot didn't seem to mind and was definitely patient with her—not making a fuss when she'd fall asleep in the tub after only meaning to take a quick bath, or when she'd cancel a meet up altogether because she'd barely made it up her steps and into her apartment to change—but she hadn't been herself and she wanted to be, for him.

She was getting better, though, as with her 26th week came more energy; this was however juxtaposed by Elliot's calls lessening in frequency and when they did come they were filled with apologies for his absence due to increased workload. He'd promised in those same calls to make it up to her in the coming weeks, though, and so when he called a few days ago as she was walking out of her 26 week appointment, she expected talk of the beach house again, or maybe even better, if there was such a thing, but what he'd called to ask was whether or not she'd like to meet his partner.

She was disappointed at first as her mind was still clouded by visions of twinkling colourful lights and warm pool water and as he explained his reasoning for the meeting, the disappointment was only replaced by confusion. He wasn't exactly sure why his partner had wanted to meet her which made the proposal even more underwhelming.

However, at second thought, she didn't mind it. In fact, it made sense for old and new to meet at some point, though she hadn't even thought of introducing Elliot and Nick. The new found logic of the situation didn't stop her from feeling weird about roping this woman into her world, though, especially when Elliot joked about her "reason" for wanting to meet him. The comment alighted a chain of insecurity in her because even if she was joking, she couldn't give that side of her to his partner and she didn't necessarily want to share why. Elliot reassured her that he hadn't said a thing about her attack and that she didn't have to say anything about it if she didn't want to, it was her business and hers alone.

She wasn't naive to the fact that his partner could have easily dug up the rumour mill to find out her secrets, but then again why'd she want to meet her? Even if she had all of her memories, what could she offer her?

In the end, she'd decided to go, her decision was driven mostly by curiosity alone, but more importantly she'd get to see Elliot, be it as it may as a third wheel on a weird arrangement, but she'd get to see him nonetheless.

As she turned onto the street with the diner a car began to pull out of a space in front of her, a few feet down from the diner, she took it as a good omen and flicked on her indicator and waited for it to exit.

+++

"If you tear the napkin into any more pieces it'll disappear," Elliot teased, dropping his hand onto hers. Ariel hadn't been able to sit still since they arrived over half an hour ago, she'd touched and adjusted everything in sight with the napkin being only her most recent victim. This level of anxiety was a sharp shift in the behaviour she'd exhibited all day—all week even, because up until they left for the meeting she was fine, excited even to meet Olivia.