tour sucks (lauren jauregui)

five - amends

"Who would it be though? Can we take a bet?" Dinah asks and Lauren raises an eyebrow.

Without missing a beat, her and Camila say, "Aren't you broke?"

"Sheesh, I didn't need it from both of you," Dinah rolls her eyes, "I have faith I'll win. So let's take a bet and you guys can give me ten bucks each."

"What the hell are you going to buy with twenty bucks?" Lauren retorts, and Dinah snorts.

"It's lonely on the road, Lauren."

"Oh for fuck's sake," Lauren retorts, brushing her off.

Dinah laughs, "I know who I'm betting on, too. This isn't hard."

"Oh, me too, but I'm not betting," Camila replies, sticking her tongue out at Dinah when she glares at her.

"Who's your bet?" Lauren asks Camila and Camila snorts.

"Well, as the only one who's been to the hospital for dehydration, I think I'm the obvious pick," Camila responds, pointing to herself and fake-gloating.

"You were my pick too," Dinah huffs, "Can I have ten bucks?"

"If you wanted ten bucks you could have just asked," Lauren says, and Camila nods.

"It's not fun if I'm just asking y'all for money," Dinah whines, resting her head back, "ugh, when are we getting off the bus? I'm hungry."

Camila responds with something about what Dinah just said, but Lauren finds herself unfocused. She hasn't even thought about eating this morning, if Dinah hadn't said anything, she's not sure she ever would've thought about it.

She focuses back in when Dinah says her name, followed by, "You good with McDonald's, Ralph?"

"Sure," Lauren nods, dismissing herself, "um, I'm going to go change."

-

"Laur? You okay?"

No, she thinks, but feels unable to get the words out. Her throat feels so dry and she can't stop sobbing to breathe.

"Laur, we're concerned. Can I come in?" Normani calls, and Lauren whimpers. She wants someone with her so badly but her voice just won't work, and oh god, they have a show tonight and they're already down Camila they can't be down her, too.

Oh god oh god oh god oh god.

"Lauren, I'm coming in, okay?"

Lauren tightens her arms around her legs, burying her face in her knees in hopes of calming herself down (even though she knows it's not working). The door clicks open and Normani rushes over, stopping in front of her and crouching down.

"Hey," she says, her voice calm, "are you okay if I hug you?"

Lauren barely manages a nod and Normani takes that as a yes, wrapping her arms around Lauren tightly, "You are going to be okay, alright? So is Mila. Her mom called a bit ago and said she's doing a lot better and she'll see you tonight. We can go after the show or you can go after the show alone or whatever you want, okay?"

Lauren nods, body loosening up a little bit as Normani rubs her back. She still feels her nails digging into the palms of her hands and isn't sure she can stop, but at least her body doesn't feel like lead anymore. Her sobs start to lessen as well, allowing her to finally take a breath.

"Dinah called your mom," Normani says cautiously, and Lauren tenses. She loves her mom to death, but she tends to overworry sometimes (and under-worry other times, but whatever), "she said that when you're overwhelmed, you watch Sleeping Beauty? Or Lion King?"