Nothing but Heartbreak

27. I'm the best

It wasn't the first time I had woken up next to Harlan but it was the first time I had woken up wrapped up in his arms. It had been not even twenty four hours and already I wanted to be with him like this forever.

I could've had more days like this. I could've been like this a lot longer than just this one night. The thought made me frown. I had hurt us both all because of my own issues. I couldn't help but feel guilty for the past. Harlan had told me to not get hung up on it. He had forgiven me, he said he understood but how was I supposed to forgive myself?

"Morning." Harlan said into the crook of my neck.

I leaned back into him trying to hold onto the feeling of being with him. I wanted to stop beating myself up over my issues and just enjoy the happiness I felt whenever I was with Harlan.

"Hi." I turned over so I could see his face.

"I love waking up next to you." He connected our lips and even now it seemed surreal.

Harlan was mine and I was laying here waiting for him to leave or say that this was some type of joke. I was waiting for my happiness to be taken away because deep down I didn't think I deserved it.

I didn't think I was enough for anyone to want to stay.

"I should get up." I pulled away.

Harlan didn't even hesitate to pull me right back and press my body against his.

"Stop." He said and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"What? I just want to start my day." I tried to wiggle away from him.

"Don't forget that I've known you for years Ava. I can read you very well. I know what you look like when you are shutting down ready to push me away, I've seen that look many times. What's going on in your head?"

"I'm scared. It's hard for me to just let someone in. I guess I'm just waiting for my happiness to be taken away."

"I'm right here, not going anywhere. I'm happy to remind you of that fact every damn day if I need to." He squeezed me tightly.

"You're better than I deserve." I smile into his chest.

"I know I'm the best. You know I was expecting you to be throwing a party this morning."

"Why would I be throwing a party?" I questioned.

"Because you get to wake up next to the hottest man on earth." He joked.

"Really? Where?" I pulled away from him looking around my bedroom.

"You're annoying." He groaned pulling me back towards him.

"And you are an ass."

"More like I have a great ass." He leaned forward and kissed me again.

I wouldn't complain about the kisses that I was getting. I knew I should be starting my day, I couldn't spend all day in bed with Harlan but I didn't want to be anywhere but right here. I didn't want to be doing anything other than kissing the man I loved.

The real world finally showed up in the form of my phone ringing.

I pulled away from Harlan but he tightened his hold on me not letting me fully leave his arms to grab my phone.

"Leave it. I want to just lay here with you." He pleaded.

"What if it's important?" I pushed him off me and grabbed my phone.

When I saw the caller ID I turned it so he could see and he just sighed and flopped down onto the bed. I didn't think I could actually ignore my mom.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hi did I wake you?"

It felt nice to hear from my mom. I always liked talking to her and I was excited to tell her about my relationship with Harlan. My best friend had always been Jade but my mom was the one person I was closest to. It had always been me and her and when anything happened it was always her I wanted to tell.

"No I've been up for a little while." I told her.

"Well I just got off the phone with your father."

The statement made my stomach drop. I sat on the edge of the bed, waiting to hear what more my father has done.

"What did he want?" I asked.

"He was calling to wonder why I hadn't told him that you got married. Why would you tell him that you were married? Why must you make this harder than it needs to?"

My mom sounded upset. It wasn't often that she ever sided with my dad over me. I hadn't expected that me telling my dad that Harlan was my husband to actually bother her. I sort of expected her to understand why I had done it.

"Does it even matter? I don't care what he thinks and it's not like he's ever bothered to be in my life." I snapped getting slightly annoyed that I even had to justify it.

"He's your father and I know your relationship is rocky but you don't need to make all this more difficult on all of us. You are a grown adult and it's about time you act like it."

I took in a sharp breath. It had felt as if she had slapped me through the phone. My dad had hurt me too many times and I was sick of it. I didn't want him in my life and I didn't care if he was slightly upset about the fact I had told him I got married without him knowing. It wasn't true but if I had gotten married I wouldn't have invited him. My mom knew that, I had thought she understood.

"You of all people should understand, I thought you were on my side. You were there with me every time he let me down or ruined my self confidence. How am I the bad guy because I lied about being married?" I argued.

"You didn't have to go to the wedding. You could've just stayed out of it but you went and you went off on him and lied to try to hurt him on his own wedding day."

"I don't want to fight about this. I was having a good morning before you called. I was actually excited to tell you that I have a boyfriend."

"You have a boyfriend?" She questioned obviously not expecting me to say that.

"I got to go mom. I'll talk to you later." I didn't wait for her to respond and I just hung up.

I hated being mad at her but I couldn't just forgive her for not understanding how things were with my dad and I. She had watched as I got hurt over and over again. She should be on my side on this.

"Are you ok?" Harlan rested his hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah I'm just so sick of him." I sighed falling into Harlan and letting him wrap me back up in his arms.

If anything would make me feel better it was this.

A/n:

Writing these two finally together and happy.... My heart. As fun as writing their fights were I think I like happy Ava and Harlan better.

-Cora Leigh