Hell Is Better With 𝒀𝒐𝒖 - Sequel to Welcome To Hell

𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 5.5 - 𝑻𝒐𝒐 𝑳𝒂𝒕𝒆

My eyes never left Chris, watching each breath he took, the friend of the group who stood behind me moving around me and greeting the people with their backs to me, and at the same time, causing Chris to look up and make eye contact with me. That's when the tears broke.

I attempted to turn around and walk away, the tears clouding my vision mixed with being intoxicated making it incredibly hard to get away from the group effectively. I dropped my cup, the liquid falling on my shoes along with who ever I stood near. I knew I was being rude, I apologized shortly as I climbed through the crowd, trying to find the exit in the large crowd.

I could hear the shouts of my name behind me, likely from Chris, but my chest couldn't take being in this house. The panic was setting in, tears falling down my face. I didn't care if he was following. Who cares.

I finally spilled out of the heavy crowd, and made my way to the front door, "Jaehyun, stop!" I rolled my eyes, stumbling for a moment as I opened the door, the fresh air washing over me like a cold shower. I made my way out onto the porch, the back of my hand flying up to wipe some of the tears from my cheeks. The autumn air was cold on them.

A hand gripped the back of my shoulder, pulling me to turn towards him. It didn't take much force, my body felt like it was weightless. Oh, to actually be weightless.

"Jaehyun! Seriously! I was trying to back you up back there, why didn't you stop?" Chris yelled. Maybe he wasn't used to the quietness outside the house, or maybe he was upset with me too.

The tears that slipped down were silent, "I don't care. I'm not wanted here why would I stick around?" The alcohol in my system made me much more upfront than normal, "You seemed pretty cool, but you've got some pretty shitty 'close friends'." I sniffled, trying to keep myself together.

"Nobody said you had to leave, stay just a little longer?" His eyebrows fell in a crease, how could he be the one upset?

I laughed at him, "Yeah, let me just stay and hang out with the people that just called me shit, who don't want me here. You'll probably walk in there and not even fight them on it, or tell them not to judge people by their covers. Maybe they're right, fuck I don't know." My voice was loud, and my words ran into each other as I slurred, "I'm leaving." I turned to walk away, my sneakers squeaking on the driveway from the drink spilled on my shoes, and then towards the sidewalk. I could hear him following, I didn't bother fighting it until he once again yanked my shoulder to look at him.

"Man, you're really going to just leave? Stand up for yourself!" Chris yelled at me, his hands in fists.

I laughed once again, but didn't say anything. I was so exhausted, I turned and walked away. My vision was still slightly blurred, but I was going to make it home. I wouldn't stay where I wasn't wanted. They didn't even know me, and yet they didn't like me. Who could ever befriend me?

"You're a pussy for this! I'll never forget this, Jaehyun! You're a pussy!"

The words burned. They hurt. I was tipsy, no doubt, but the words did just as much damage as they would've done sober. It didn't hurt nearly this much coming from my parents. Why did it hurt even worse coming from him? More tears fell, I looked back to see he was sat on the end of the drive. I turned back, continuing on the way I hoped was the right way home. I turned the corner, and let the sobs rack my body once I was out of sight. I knew the answer to my own question. It hurt more coming from a stranger. It must be true then.

My body shook with every cry, all the tears from today, from yesterday, from years. It all came out. Why did life hurt so bad? Maybe I am a pussy.