Chapter 17

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"Lilypaw, do you know where we're going?" Jayfeather asks me and I suppress a growl of frustration. It's been a few days and we're nowhere close to the clans. After discussing the best way to get home we decided to try the direction that Jayfeather came from. It would've been a good plan except for the fact that Jayfeather is blind and he can't be sure if he was here before or not.

"I should be asking you this question! You're the one who was here before. This was a stupid plan," I mutter and Jayfeather lashes his tail.

"It's not my fault I'm blind. This was the best chance we have because it hasn't been that long since I was here. All we have to do is find Patches and her barn and I'll know how to get to the clans," he confidently mews and I roll my eyes.

"Okay sure. Whatever you say," I sigh and look back at the kits who are beginning to trail further and further behind us. I stop to let them catch up but Jayfeather keeps walking. "How are you two doing?"

"Lilypaw I'm tired! Can we take a rest?" Willowkit asks and Jayfeather lashes his tail.

"It's only sunhigh! We haven't been walking for that long. We'll rest in a little bit, but we need to keep going," Jayfeather mews.

I turn and start walking towards him, dreading what I'm about to say. "Jayfeather, what if we never find the clans? At some point we have to give up. Traveling is no life for growing kits. They need proper mentoring and most of my friends are most likely warriors. I was barely an apprentice when I left so I still have a lot of training to do before I become a warrior. Most of the clan probably thinks I'm-" I'm cut off by a terrified screech.

"Lilypaw! Look! What is it?" Shimmerkit yelps. I turn around and feel terror overtake me. My stomach drops when I see the reddish fur and beady eyes. I know I have to find a way to lead it away. Jayfeather and the kits have no chance of being able to fight it off.

"Jayfeather, a fox!" I call to him as I slowly walk towards it. "Take the kits somewhere safe. I'll fight it off."

"Lilypaw, you can't! You weren't trained to fight a fox!" Jayfeather yells, worry thickening his mew.

"I have to do this," I mew as the fox locks eyes with me. It starts to charge at me and I run away from Jayfeather and the kits, their cries fading in the distance as I get further and further away.

************

"Jayfeather, when is Lilypaw coming back?" Shimmerkit asks, worry oozing from his voice. I hear his sister shift closer to him for comfort.

"I'm not sure. She should be back soon. How about you two go to sleep. It'll make the time go faster, and you won't worry," I tell them and I feel the uncertainty coming off them in waves.

"Well, what if she comes back while we're sleeping? I don't want her to think that we didn't care whether she came home or not. And we almost always sleep curled up beside her, so I don't think we could fall asleep without her," Willowkit frets and I know I have to reassure them, I just don't know how.

"Well, if I hear her coming back, I'll be sure to wake you up before she gets here. She's a good fighter, she always was. Even as a kit she was going to make a promising warrior. Once we get back to the clans you two will make amazing warriors too. But to be an amazing warrior, you need to sleep. I'll lay here while you fall asleep. Just pretend that I'm Lilypaw," I tell them and they slowly get up and walk over to me.

Shimmerkit curls up at my stomach and Willowkit lays under my chin. I can only wonder how Lilypaw falls asleep like this.

"Goodnight you two. Sleep well," I mew and I feel them finally relax as they slowly fall asleep. As I lay there with them curled up beside me, I begin to understand the appeal of having kits. They are so small and innocent, and it's your job to protect them and teach them how to survive. And, in return, they will love you endlessly.

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