needles • frerard

fourty nine

It's on a beach, in Italy, that he realizes.

It isn't some big revelation, it isn't anything in particular.

He's sitting next to his husband, under a ridiculous beach umbrella because he might've married a vampire, holding his hand. They don't get to hold hands in public back home, not as often as they'd like. But now they're holding hands and no one's really paying attention.

The tank top he's wearing is doing nothing to hide his hickies, the big obnoxious ones from two nights ago. They've only faded a little, but if he took off his shirt, there'd be many fresh ones along his hips, from when Gerard got down on his knees again last night.

It's on the pretty, Italian beach that he realizes that he's going to be okay.

Maybe not for a while, but he'll be okay. It'll take years, Frank knows it will. But nearly six months ago, he was in the worst place he's ever been, he was in the darkest time in his life and now he's on a fucking Italian beach with his husband and he's clean and sober, they both are. He'll be okay.

Frank looks over at Gerard, laying peacefully on his beach towel. Frank raises their hands and kisses Gerard's. The black-haired man smiles, pulling his sunglasses up into his hair.

"Hi."

"Hi." Frank replies softly, his heart skipping a few times at the sound of Gerard's voice.

"What was that for?"

"I love you, that's what."

Gerard squeezes his hand. "I love you too, pretty boy."

Frank smiles and looks back at the water. Right now, everything that's happened between the day at the tattoo shop and now is replaying in his mind, from Gerard's hand in his as he woke up in the hospital, to their first kiss, to their first fuck. Frank still blushes when he thinks about that, his legs wrapped around Gerard's hips, pulling on his hair, moaning into a filthy kiss. He'll fix his broken relationship with sex, his wedding night proved it. Frank is still proud of that. Proud that he's letting go of the years and years of being used, or using himself. Letting go of the years of being an object to anyone and everyone. It'll take time and work, but Frank knows he can heal.

He'll be okay.