Corpse Husband One-shots

Miss You ⨀

Author: https://thefanficmonster.tumblr.com/

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warning: Swearing, Heartbreak, Break-Up, Depression

Genre: ANGST

Summary: After a break-up, each side thinks the other one is probably not struggling as hard as they are. We all underestimate the pain of our significant other, always sure they care a lot less than they do. This is of a love story that had been of two people - turned into a break-up of two sides.

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I don't wanna look like this. Fuck, I look like a zombie. As if all the blood has been drained from my body and as though I've had no sleep for months. The latter is close to the reality I've been experiencing for the past week or so. Almost two weeks have passed since a meaningful chapter of my life was closed. Since he closed it. I mean, I saw it coming, but I was prepared to do anything to prevent it. I was ready to fight for what we had. But he threw the fight, telling me it wasn't worth trying to reverse a train-wreck that has already happened. From his perspective, what we had was already put an end to, even before he officially severed the last ropes of hope I was holding onto.

I don't wanna feel like this. Fuck this. Fuck me and my rash decisions. I don't wanna allow myself to feel like this. I have no right to be heartbroken and in pain when I brought this upon myself. Upon the both of us. I knew she wanted to postpone the inevitable until it became avoidable, but in my eyes, there was no way what we had would be saved. I guess I'll never know now. I'll never know cause I didn't give it a shot. I didn't let her put up a fight either. She's a strong girl, I'm sure she would've fought hard, enough for the both of us, but that would've put a ton of guilt and regret on my shoulders and it would've put her through absolute hell. I know I did the right thing by cutting it when I did, then why do I feel like this?

I miss her. I miss her so fucking much. I wish I didn't, I wish I could rewire my brain into thinking and functioning differently, but here I am: living like a hollow tree with her living in my head rent-free. As though she was the soul within me that kept me alive. Actually alive, not just a bag of organs, drawing breath and blinking every now and then. She left and a lot of me left with her. I would sat she took it away, but I know she'd never do that. Not on purpose, at least. She would never steal anything from me. She didn't steal my heart either, I gave it to her. And I also took it back.

I knew that this would happen. I should've trusted my instincts when they were screaming at me, telling me to not succumb to the wishful thinking. Telling me not to live in some imaginary fairytale where love is forever and everything's perfect. Thing is, I never believed in fairytales, or happily-ever-afters. I never got the chance to. All my life I've been surrounded by dysfunctional couples and they taught me a very valuable lesson - the relationship you're in can either make you or break you. It depends on you and your partner equally - how hard they swing and how well you defend yourself - and vice versa - on an emotional level. They'll hurt you as much as you let them. And all my life, time and time again, I let my partners hurt me, some more some less. I always had my guard up, maybe it was lowered sometimes, but never all the way down. With him, it was all the way down, non-existent even. So when he took that emotional swing at me, I had nothing to protect me. I was knocked out cold and I'm still struggling my way back to consciousness.

FUCK LOVE

FUCK LOVE

I broke my mirror the other day. I just got so tired of seeing the same ghostly pale face every time I entered the bathroom. It felt like it was mocking me, like it served as proof of how weak and dumb I am for repeating my mistakes and then crying about it.