chat noir x reader; falling

chapter twelwe: drunk ❗️(tw)

( kinda sad chapter, mentions of alcohol and selfharm❗️❗️❗️❗️)
adriens pov

i couldnt sleep, all i was all night up thinking about y/n. was she safe? was she hurt?
i didnt have school since its was saturday.
i was staring up at my ceiling the whole night, having plagg sleeping next to me.
i stayed up all night, seeing the sunrise and the eiffel tower with it.
i got up, 8am, on a sunday?!
i took a cold shower to get some energy, i wanted to text alya, but what if she asked how i found out where y/n is?
maybe they are still sleeping?
i dont want to bother them, specially after such a night.

hours went by, its 6pm now.
i went outside for a walk, still couldnt focus on anything, y/n was all over my mind, and at this point i dont know if it was good or bad.
i felt someone grab my arm and drag me to them, it was, marinette?

" hey mari!" i said
" having a rough day?" she said
" how did you know?" i said, is it really that visible?
" drink this!" she said holding a bottle. i had no clue what it was, but worth a try, she was my friend after all
my vision becomes blurry and i feel more tired, i smelled my breath and it smelled like alcohol?
" Lila, now!" marinette screamed and next thing i felt were her soft lips next to mine, as i saw a quick flashlight.
marinette walked away and laughed, leaving me alone drunk.
i called y/n, but she didnt answer my calls. no way in hell shes still sleeping, right?

y/ns pov

i heard a notification from my phone

" NEW POST: from @LilaRossi - LadyBlog
' Adrien Agreste caught kissing Marinette Dupain-Cheng!"
what?? i couldnt believe my eyes, this clearly wasnt photoshopped.
i looked through the comments, " my ship finally sailed" " they are so much cuter " " atleast marinette wouldnt play with his heart"

what?

i started feeling tears from my eyes, was he the one playing with my feelings all the time?
i looked back at alya, who sat next to me, not veing able to say a single word.

" sorry, i think it will be better if i go home. dont want to embarass myself even more haha"
i quickly grabbed my stuff
and i ran out of her place, not rven beinf able to say goodbye. as i stepped outside, i felt more tears, i saw people staring at me, and i knew why.
i ran home, didnt care about thw million questions my parents asked me about.
i locked my room, layed down at my bed and cried, i cried so loud, and for so long. i heard more notifs from my phone, but i didnt care, i literally didnt have the energy to even look at who texted me, infear of seeing adrien saying, " sorry, i found someone better" " maybe she wont play with my feelings"

fuck, i didnt want to look at my blade again, no, dont go back into my bad habits again, i will regret it, i know it.

i screamed into my pillow, i wanted to let it all out.
til i heard a knock on my balcony, it was chat.
i didnt want him to see me like this, im not even allowed to see him again because of ladybug.
but i opened him, but turned my back directly, i didnt want him to see me like this, swollen eyes, i couldnt even talk, i screamed and cried so much, my vision wasnt clear either.
but he hugged me, from behind.
-" oh y/n"
he made me spin looking at his direction, making eye contact with him.
-" y/n im so fucking sorry"
" you dont have to be, dont worry. please go, if ladybug spots you here with me this will be our last talk, and i dont want u to see me like this either, just im ah im sorry i dont want it to make it look like im playing with your heart. whole of paris already sees me as the heartbreaker. i dont want you to see me as it too, funny huh, the 'heartbreaker' goes through a heartbreak" i said, which more seemed like a vent.
-" y/n listen to me-"his breath smelled a bit like alcohol.
" chat, your breath- have you been drinking, in that case i recommend that you go now, you wont remember this anyways and you will regret what you will say" i started walking to the corner of my room, and sat there as i saw a tear from chats eye, he didnt say anything, he just swang away
i put my head on my knees, not crying anymore, but the silence felt too loud. i felt judged by everyone, maybe it would be better if i moved at this point, nobody likes me anymore, not even i myself, i dont like what ive turned into. from the sweet girl everybody trusted to the one who plays with feelings, nobody trusts me anymore.
i hate this so much.
i had so little energy left, i fell asleep in my corner.