"i'm crazy but you like that" - skins

Episode 6.2

I woke up the following morning and - for the first time in weeks - immediately jumped from my bed.

I got changed, brushed my hair through, winged my eyeliner and put my hoop earrings. I grabbed my phone, tobacco and lighter before heading down to the front door to head out, carefully avoiding my mother and her husband who were bickering in the kitchen.

I opened the door, and saw Naomi, stood leaning on the fence outside my house.

"Right on time." I noted as I headed towards her.
"As are you." She smiled. "Ready?"
"Definitely." I stated, and then overtook her to begin leading the way to the college.

I spent the entire walk thinking about what Naomi had said the night before, about what Effy and Cook would be thinking of my unexplained absence after the sighting of them.
I couldn't help but be angry at myself for allowing myself to wallow in my own emotions about it.
And I was so angry at Cook. I was angry that he'd done it, and I was angry that I hadn't heard from him.
And I couldn't even think about Effy's smug face when she'd saw me without wanting to lash out at anything.
The entire situation was infuriating me.

"Jofie?" Naomi snapped me out of my thoughts as we walked near the college. "Are you even slightly listening to me?"
"Honestly? No." I told her. "I'm sorry. I'm just... preoccupied."
"Cook and Effy?" She asked.
"Yeah. I'm just... I'm fucking angry."
"And hurt?" She sympathised.
I scoffed. "What? No. I'm not fucking upset anymore. I'm just angry."

Naomi and I walked towards the steps up to the college, in the midst of a busy crowd. Suddenly, Naomi grabbed my shoulder and shoved me down while she aggressively whispered, "get down. This way."
She dragged me through the crowd, and I managed to peer over to see what we were ducking from.

"Uh, did we just hide from Emily?" I raised an eyebrow once we were on the other side of the crowd and Naomi had allowed me to stand again.
"Yes. No questions asked, please." She sighed.
"But -"
"Jofie!" She scolded.
"Okay. Fine." I gave in.
"Look, I'll see you later, okay?" She started to walk away.
"You rushing off somewhere?" I quizzed her as she continued to walk.
"I just said I'd meet someone. I'll talk to you later."
I watched as Naomi rushed off before I had a chance to ask her anything else, and it was clear that that was her plan.
I stood for a second, the curiosity consuming me, before I shrugged it off and walked inside the crowded college.

I walked through the rowdy corridors until I reached my locker.
I opened it, shoved the single book I had in there into my bag, and then grabbed the miniature flask of vodka that I had stashed in there and tucked it into my bra.

I shut my locker and turned around to see a face that I hadn't wanted to see.

Cook stood approximately ten metres away, and he was glaring at me, a scowl on his usually happy-to-see-me face.
I glared back at him, refusing to break the eye contact.
And then I watched as Cook looked at me with a look of pure disgust as he turned his nose up, and walked in the opposite direction.

I felt my entire body and mind fill with fury, and despite the busy corridors that were lined with students, I couldn't let it go.

"Oi!" I yelled, causing several people in the proximity to startle, as I walked directly up to Cook and shoved him from behind.
"What the fuck?" He angrily shouted, spinning around to face me.
"Who the fuck gave you the right to look at me like that?" I demanded.
"Like what?" He rolled his eyes.
"Like you hate me. Like I've done something wrong. Like you're fucking disgusted at me! Who gave you the right?" My voice was loud as I shouted at him, uncaring about the thirty or forty other students watching the argument unfold around us.
"You gave me that right." He pointed at me as he shouted back.
"I did?"
"Yes! When you fucked my best fucking mate!" He shrieked.
I let out a shriek of stress, irritation and fury, before yelling, "you fucking dickhead!"
"I'm a dickhead? You're a fucking dickhead, Jofie! I wouldn't have let myself..." He stopped himself, clearly not wanting to say what his mouth was about to. "I wouldn't have come near you if I'd have known you were going to throw yourself at my fucking mate."
"I didn't fucking shag Freddie, you stupid prick!" I shouted.
He scoffed. "Do you think I'm fucking stupid?"
It was at that point that I noticed that JJ was beside us. He stepped in and asked, "do you think we should take this somewhere else?", to which Cook and I yelled in unison, "no!"
"Yes, I think you're fucking stupid, James!" I replied to him before shoving him for a second time. "I haven't had sex with Freddie. Whereas you actually did fuck Effy. Oh, and Pandora, for that matter." I turned and saw Pandora, standing sheepishly against a locker, trying to avoid my gaze. "Oh, hi, Panda! You look awkward. Oh, you haven't told your boyfriend yet? It's nice to see Thomas is back!" I taunted.
"Jofie -" She tried to plead to me without any other words.
"Your secret is safe. I'll keep my mouth shut." I told her, and waited until she sheepishly walked off before yelling, "for now!"
I turned back to Cook who had a look of deep thought in his eyes. "So, you're telling me there's nothing going on with you and Freddie?"
I looked him up and down, sighed and then rolled my eyes. "Fuck off, James."
I stormed off, shoving my middle finger in between two snickering, bitchy girls as I did.