Why I Hate Danfics

Chapter 16-

Short chapters aren't good. Unless you're writing a prologue, or epilogue, or some sort of special form or poem, don't do it. Something about short-short-short chapters annoys me, and I forbid all of you from doing it. At least a page and a half, more if possible. Combine chapters if you have to.

"I sighed"

"Dan blushed"

"Phil giggled"

Basically refrain from those verbs and you'll be gr10. Also Dan doesn't chuckle more than once a chapter.

I turned on "Collar Full" by Panic! at the Disco and cried in the elevator.

Yeah I get Collar Full is a sad song but not a crying-in-public kind of song. (I actually read this in a fic once) What I'm trying to get at here, is don't make your characters over-dramatic. Like, don't make them faint at the sight of meeting Dan Howell. I don't think that happens IRL.

Don't introduce your book by saying, "Hi, my name is Emma Thompson, I am twenty one years old and a YouTuber with 6,666,666 subscribers." Literally if you begin your book like that I will click out of your page, click back onto your page, stare at it, print it out, put the paper through a shredder, burn it, eat it, and scatter the remains on a windy beach during a windy day in late fall. Seriously.

Maybe Emma doesn't like MCR. Maybe she doesn't know how to sing or dance or write. Maybe she's not depressed or suicidal. Maybe she doesn't even know who the heckie deckie Dan Howell and Phil Lester are, she just meets a guy in a bar and they hit it off and maybe she kisses him but she can't quite remember because she was rather drunk. Maybe they're actually normal people.

Remember this when you write a story. People in fanfictions are still normal people, so before posting something, read through your story and think, "Would someone without a mental illness do this in real life?" If the answer is no, maybe you need to reconsider some things.