Death: Who Am I (ONC 2021)

Questioned

It was beautiful outside. The tops of trees barely made it to the third-floor window. Sunlight streamed into the office.

Aisling sat on the same couch as last time. Wait for Sarai, to question her mental health.

All the furniture was of dark wood from the bookshelf to the coffee table. The coach she was on was dark red and the one across a dark green. Nothing said calm in the room. She assumed its purpose wasn't for her situation.

She looked back outside. She wanted to be out there. Walking under the sun. But she was wasting it inside. Her parents wouldn't like it.

A door opened and closed.

"Your back again," Sarai said before she could turn her head.

"Yeah," Aisling grinned.

Sarai sat down on the green couch.

"So do you want to talk about why I'm back, my experience, emotions?"

"Whatever you want. I'm not here to judge you." Aisling rolled her eyes.

"Okay," she said, "it was a horrible experience. They put me under a drug and I can't remember what happened. It was weird. I think something went wrong. The only thing I remember clearly was escaping the place. The one nice thing about it all. Yeah, there was one good thing. I was able to sleep. All that rest made me feel better in the evening when agent Rayon brought me in. My experience was I don't remember. And afterward felt good. But it didn't last forever. How about you? How's your day?"

"Good. So you weren't sleeping at all until they drugged you. Why weren't you sleeping before? Were you not take the pills?"

"As I said before. I won't ever take sleeping pills. I had an aunt try to kill herself with them. So no thanks. Yes. I wasn't sleeping until I was kidnapped. Which wasn't a cool experience. Not something I wouldn't want to go through again."

"What were you doing on the pier?"

"Enjoying the beach like everyone else. It was a beautiful day."

"Why were you taken?"

"I don't know." She shrug.

"What did your parents think? How did they feel about you leaving?"

"Troubled. I'm pretty sure that they are seeing this year as the year I'm questioning myself. Learn who am I."

"What have you learned about yourself?"

"That I have a lot of questions. That I'm different. That I want to fit into the world. What about you? Has this work taught you anything about yourself?"

"We're done," Sarai said closing the folder she didn't look at.

"Fine," Aisling said.

"What are your future plans? Keep exploring yourself?"

"Yes, but I don't think I'll go anywhere. I promise." Aisling smiled.

"Okay. Have you thought about the classes for next term? You will finish your degree?"

Aisling sighed. She has barely thought about it. Right now all she cared about was answers for who she is.

"I have a general idea."

"So what classes do you want to take?"

For the next hour, Sarai asked general questions about her future and her family. It didn't help her. Aisling kept giving shorter answers and taking her time. Sarai was getting annoyed.

"You should take a deep breath. I can see your annoyed doctor. Isn't that something you tell your patients?"

"Clearly, you don't need my help. But Aisling you need to face your insecurity."

"I'm not insecure. I know who I am. Somewhat. I just need to find my destiny. Or future. Just someone or something that can push me to be me. Whatever that is?"

They sat in silence. Neither said anything just watching each other. There was no noise from the outside.

Life sucked. She looked outside. White clouds were swimming across the blue sea of sky. There was just a hint of the capital building and its huge lawn.

There weren't tall buildings around the federal building. She could make out one street with cars driving. Her parents would be disappointed in her when she would come home.

Sarai got up and left. There was nothing more for them to speak about. She wouldn't tell them everything. Let them wondered what she was hiding.

Who she is isn't for them to know. She needed to answer her own questions.