I Die Often Hank

Chapter 20

"Sweet dreams are made of this"

"Who am I to disagree"

"I travel the world"

"And the seven seas"

"Everybody's looking for something"

"Some of them want to use you"

"Some of them want to get used by you"

"Some of them want to abuse you"

"Some of them want to be abused"

We continued our performance and I did my best to ignore all the pain I was in and enjoy the moment. We sang our hearts out with our arms wrapped around each other. We made a memory almost all of them would forget, something Erik was probably counting on. 

I looked to Erik and we divided up which drunk people were our responsibility. I, of course, had been given a handful, Peter, Scott, and Hank. I did my best to corral them and lead them up to our floor. Peter tried to speed up ahead but he just ran into a wall at several hundred miles an hour. I used my hand and hauled him off the ground. I turned back around and Hank was gone. I put Scott into a little bit of a headlock and held Peter with my hand as I pulled them to our floor. Eventually, we made it to Peter's room, I pushed to door open and shoved him into bed. He moved to get up and grabbed his walkman and held it up threateningly. 

"You can get this tomorrow morning if you stay in bed, if not..."

"Going and staying to bed now"

Peter laid down in his bed and almost immediately fell asleep. I pulled Scott out of Peter's room and towards his own. We made it and nudged Scott towards the bed with my stump. He obeyed surprisingly and climbed into his own bed. I was leaving the room when I heard him mumble in his sleep.

"I love you Jean"

I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that and pray to god Erik has Jean asleep and unable to read my mind. Great, now where the fuck did Hank sneak off to. I looked around everywhere and couldn't find him, I had decided to give up. I sure he can survive one night somewhere weird. I went to my room to go back to bed and there I find him, starfished and taking up my entire bed. He's fast asleep in just his slacks and I try to move his arm to make room, but it doesn't budge. I crawl onto the very edge of my own bed and pray that I don't fall off in the middle of the night. Once I get in, however, it is made clear that even asleep Hank has one sole goal in life; to cuddle. He grabs my side while turning over in a very skilled maneuver and soon my head is nestled right above his shoulder. He's pulled me practically on top of him and is holding me so tight that I can't escape. I relax in his hold and go back to sleep.

10 hours of cuddling later (low key jealous)

I wake up and the sun is shining in my eyes and it smells like booze. I attempt to pull myself up, but Hank's surprisingly strong arms keep me stuck pressed against him as he continues to quietly snore. I decide to let him sleep, then I get bored and start poking his chest. He wakes up and looks around confused. 

"Oh, hello, how did I get here?"

"Drunk karaoke, and you actually got yourself here"

Hank looked confused as if he didn't remember a thing. He probably didn't judging by how strong the booze smell coming from him was. 

"How do we always wake up with you pinned on top of me?"

"Bones, even asleep you do everything you can to cuddle me"

"I do?"

"Yes, you grab hold and never let go. Not saying I don't also enjoy it, but my god is it your body's unconscious instinct" 

"To be fair, it's just so much more comfortable this way"

"You're not wrong, it is pretty great. You are a space heater and I love it"

"Do you think Charles would let us share a room?"

"It's worth a shot"

Hank released his hold and I rolled off of him before standing up. He soon followed. He glanced down and spotted the bruise on his side.

"How did I get bruised?"

"You might've fallen on the stairs a few times"

"Might've?"

"In my defense, I had to move you, Peter, and Scott, and keep you all alive. Shit, I have to go downstairs to see Peter, I confiscated his walkman to make him go to bed"

"You sound like a principle"

"Okay, Professor McCoy"

"I don't even teach"

"You could, someday," I spoke leaving the room with Peter's walkman. I think Peter deserves a little prank for not replacing that spare tire. I know exactly how to get him too. 

A few minutes later

Peter stumbled into the kitchen very hungover. I held up one of his twinkies in front of my mouth.

"Morning silverware"

He glanced up and his eyes widened at the sight of me with his twinkie. He sped over and grabbed it from my hand. He looked smug as he took a bite while looking me directly in the eyes. That was before he immediately spit it out in disgust. 

"What did you do to my child?!"

"You bite your children?"

"That's beside the point"

"I filled it with mayo to get back at you for not replacing the spare tire in the car"

"I will get you back for this"

"I would love to see you try"