ALWAYS (Harry Potter fanfiction) (Snape fanfiction)

Chpter 27

Arabella didn't want to go to her dorm, she didn't want to face her housemates, and yet she didn't want to be alone.  She walked to Myrtle's bathroom and let her tears fall, she sat in the floor and hugged her knees.

"Who is disturbing my endless suffering?" Myrtle yelled from a stall. Arabella let out a shaky breath.

"I'm sorry, Myrtle, I didn't mean to bother you" Arabella wiped her tears with the sleeve of her robes.

"Oh, it's you, Arabella" Myrtle floated towards her and sat next to her. They were well acquainted now, last year she had spent a good amount of time in that very bathroom just hiding from everyone, "are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just- I just found out something I'm pretty sure I was not supposed to find out"

"Hey" Myrtle said soothingly, rubbing Arabella's back, she couldn't physically touch her but it was comforting... in a way, "I know you, Arabella. I know how strong you are, and you are gonna get through this" Myrtle told her. Arabella smiled at her and wiped her tears.

"Thank you, Myrtle, but, I would still like to stay here a while, if that's okay with you" Arabella told her, Myrtle nodded and sat beside her.

It was nearly three in the morning when Arabella got up from the position she was in and went to her room. Everything was so silent, and she loved it. It was as if she had entered another dimension, one entirely made for her, with no pain, no noise, no expectations, just peace. Arabella stood by the window, looking at the night sky for a while, feeling her body become more and more exhausted by the minute, she had only five hours until mandatory breakfast. Since it was the first day of classes, the head teachers gave out the schedules and arranged any mistakes or changes there had been. Arabella though it might be better to go to bed.

By the time Arabella woke up the next day, with Blake shaking her, she felt as if she had just laid down. Never again, she thought, I'm not staying up late never again. Arabella's head was pounding, it felt like the worst hangover ever, and she had had some pretty bad hangovers. After getting her schedule and changing to Advanced Care of Magical Creatures, she would go straight to Madam Pomfrey, at least she'd let her sleep in the Infirmary.

"At what time did you come in yesterday?" Blake asked her.

"Past three. I uh- I had a fight with my dad and I just didn't want to come here right away" Arabella half lied.

"Are you okay?" Blake took Arabella's hand and forced her to look at her in the eye.

'Yeah, I will be okay" Arabella said confidently. The truth had completely broken her but she had already made peace with it.

Blake dragged Arabella with her to breakfast, Severus was waiting in the entrance for her. Blake squeezed Arabella's hand reassuringly and left them alone to talk.

"Arabella, I-" Severus started.

"I am sorry I gave you Veritaserum, I shouldn't have done it and I will comply to whatever consequences you seem fit" Arabella blurted out, not looking at her father in the eyes.

"I accept your apology, but I must apologize as well, I never meant for you to find you" Severus told her, and Arabell noticed he said 'I never meant for you to find out', he didn't say 'I didn't mean for you to find out this way' he just never wanted her to find out, and that hurt her, "Still, I need you to know that regardless of the conditions in which you were conceived,  I love you, you are my reason to live, Arabella"

"I know, Dad, I love you too. But that doesn't change the fact that you lied to me, it doesn't change the fact that you admitted to still agreeing with Voldemort!" Arabella whispered-yelled.

"Arabella, I don't work for him anymore"

"I know you don't, but I also know that if it hadn't been my mum, if it had been anyone else, you'd still be a Death Eater!" Arabella said it carefully, she didn't want anyone else to hear, "oh, and I need you to change me from Arithmancy to Advanced Care of Magical Creatures"

"Arabella, don't you wa to talk-?" Severus started, but his daughter interrupted him.

"No, dad, I really don't. I just-" Renata didn't finish the sentence, she just shook her head and left to sit next to Cedric at the Hufflepuff table.

"Hey" he said cheerfully as he felt Arabella resting her head in his shoulder, then he looked at her, she had dark circles under her eyes, which were glassy and red, "you look awful, are you okay?" He asked worriedly.

"I just... I didn't get enough sleep and my head feels like it's going to explode" Arabella whined and rubbed her face against his robes, trying to hide from the light coming from the windows, it made her eyes and head hurt more.

"I'll take you to the infirmary after breakfast, okay?" Arabella nodded and smiled at him as he fed her a strawberry, from which she bit half off, Cedric ate the other half.

"Aw, you guys are so sweet" Hannah Abbot, from Harry's hear, said, "are you guys finally dating?" She asked almost hopefully. Cedric opened his mouth to answer, but Arabella pinched him.

"We're just friends" Arabella smiled at her.

"Yeah, just friends" Cedric said dryly. Hannah quickly said sorry and got distracted by Professor Sprout giving her her schedule. Cedric looked at Arabella, who was just playing with a blueberry, ignoring the pancakes and scrambled eggs "you haven't touched your food"

"I'm not hungry right now" Arabella smiled without her eyes.

"My darling, you either eat your breakfast or I will literally shove it down your throat" Cedric whispered to her ear, Arabella chuckled and nodded, taking small bites from her breakfast. 

Almost through the end, Professor Snape went to the Hufflepuff table, and handed Arabella a schedule, then told her that she didn't have to go to Arithmancy, he would give her a corrected schedule by the next day. Arabella thanked him.

Almost by the end of breakfast, Fred went to sit next to Arabella, practically shoving a boy off the bench. He grabbed her schedule and compared it with his.

"You dropped out of Divination? Don't you love me anymore?" Fred asked dramatically, "ugh, I don't understand, we have nearly the same classes, and yet we only share Defense Against the Dark Arts and Transfigutation, you have those with George, are you cheating on me with him?" He put his hand over his chest and fell into the table, almost dipping his hair in a glass of pumpkin juice.

"I didn't want you to find out this way... but yes, George and I are just meant to be" Arabella tried to say seriously but burst out laughing. Fred shook his head and grabbed Arabella's face, then pulled her to kiss her in the forehead, then he stood up and went to the e trance of the Great Hall, where George was waiting for him. As Arabella followed Fred with her eyes as he left, George turned to look at her, their gazes met for a moment, Arabella bit the inside of her cheek and half smiled, while George winked and gave her a full smile.

"Do you want to go to Hospital Wing now?" Cedric pulled her attention.

"Yeah" Arabella said in a small voice, and pouted.

"Come, hop on" Cedric smiled and gave his back to Arabella, who stood up in the bench to climb into Cedric's back.