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CHAPTER THIRTY TWO
A WHOLE DAMN ARMY


"Okay, everyone, listen up!" Jacob raised his voice to be heard

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"Okay, everyone, listen up!" Jacob raised his voice to be heard.

Montana's response to Dakota faded from her lips and the casual chatter between the two girls, Quil and Embry quietened. The four of them turned their attention to Jacob, who was leaning an arm against the Volkswagen Rabbit.

"If I'm gonna be the designated driver for tonight, I want to lay down some ground rules whilst you're all still sober."

"Oh, here we go." Embry rolled his eyes. "Don't touch the car, in fact, don't even look at the car–"

Montana elbowed him in the ribs to shut him up. Embry frowned and lightly pushed her shoulder back in response. After recovering from her momentary loss of balance, Montana shoved him back extra hard. He stumbled into Quil, who threw a disgruntled look in their direction and straightened out his jacket.

"First of all," Jacob began, ignoring Embry's words, though he did briefly make a point of glaring at him. "And there will be no arguments over this. Montana gets to call shotgun–"

Embry, Quil and Dakota all let out sounds of protest.

"No–" He held up his hand, silencing them. "–Arguments."

Montana smirked. Dakota pulled a face at her.

"Secondly," Jacob continued. "Any damages done to the car will be paid for in full. Which leads on to thirdly, if you think you're going to throw up on the way back, do not, and I cannot stress this enough, even bother getting in the car."

"But then how will we get home?" Embry questioned.

Jacob shrugged. "Walk," he answered simply. Dakota raised her hand. Jacob sighed, rubbing his temple. "Yes?"

"What if I do that but on the way back Victoria kills me?"

Montana gaped at her. "Oh my god, don't say shit like that–"

"What?! I'm just concerned for my safety!" Dakota defended. "Plus, you would have to live with that guilt for the rest of your life. Do you really want that?"

"Okay, okay, okay, I won't force you to walk home," Jacob assured. "Happy?"

Dakota's lips curved into a satisfactory smile. "Very."

"Any more questions?" Jacob asked exasperatedly.

"Yes," Embry stated. Montana closed her eyes and exhaled. "What–" He pointed at Jacob's shoes. "Are those?"

Jacob looked down, utterly baffled. "Shoes?"

"Dude, they're horrible," Embry grimaced.

"Horribly uncool," Dakota chimed in.

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