Responsibilities Of An Idol Leader | KNJ X OC ✔️

3. Helpful Discussion

"Namjoon," he looks at me and I know he can tell that I'm feeling completely uneasy about this discussion, "I know this might be a tough topic to discuss, but I'm glad you told me about this. I'm here for you every step of the way. If you find out that you are related to this kid, you know I'm here to talk about it with you and I'm always here for support. Who knows, maybe he's not your child. But, we'll find out soon."

"Thanks, Hyung. I appreciate it," I sincerely say to Yoongi, "You and Jin are the only ones who knew about Sooyoung, back in the day. I don't know if I should say anything to the other members."

"Maybe not right now. This is only a speculation. You need to find out more before bringing it up to the rest of the guys," He reasons with me.

"That makes sense. I just can't seem to think clearly right now," I admit.

"I can understand that. This is something that could change your life, Namjoon."

"Life-altering," I think out loud to myself, in a daze, but what Yoongi suggests next definitely gets my attention.

"How do you feel about eventually getting back in contact with Sooyoung?" Yoongi poses this question and I start to feel anxious which Yoongi can sense, "Joon, take a couple deep breaths, man."

I inhale and exhale a couple times.

"I've thought about it and I'm nervous about reaching out to her. I haven't spoken to her in over five years," I answer, honestly.

"Well, hold off on trying to communicate with her until you speak to Sejin-nim first, at least. It's likely that if you try to contact her, she might not want to speak to you. And, if she does and we find out that what we assume is true, then we need to take the proper steps. This kind of news will greatly influence your life. But, it's also going to be even more complicated with the fact that if the news comes out to the public, it will also affect Sooyoung and the young boy," Yoongi advises and explains his view on how everything might need to be handled. I listened intently the whole time.

"Right, I want them to be safe," I say out loud, "Hyung, do you really think that little boy could be my son?"

"It's not impossible. But, again, we are all just making assumptions. Let's not think too much about that, yet. Focus on opening up communication with Sooyoung first. I know it's been years and I know that a little part of you still cares for her, Namjoon. You need to mentally prepare yourself for that."

"I still think about her a lot from time to time, so, in a way, I feel like I still have a place in my heart for her. I feel like I always will. That was a tough decision in my life- letting her go. And, I'm sure she struggled with the break up. I'm nervous trying to reach out to her," I admittedly say out loud to not just Yoongi, but also to myself.

"Did you think it was the right decision, back then?" Yoongi looks at me, questioningly.

"At the time, I thought it was the best decision for both of us. She was living out her dream and so was I. And, I felt like if we stayed with each other, long distance, it would distract us from furthering our personal goals. But, even though I didn't show it around you guys, I was a wreck over the break up for a while. I should have tried harder for her," I tell him.

"I could tell you were having a hard time back then, but you also hid it so well, especially around the younger members. You were still so strong for them during our career hardships on top of your break-up. Though, you know you could have come to me and Jin about that."

"It was in the past, Hyung. I didn't want to burden you with my issues. But, this one is big and I might need you and Jin, and eventually the rest of the boys, when everything is more clear," I say to Yoongi, feeling content that I have these guys I consider brothers.

"You know we'll all be here for you and we'll help you figure everything out, okay?" Yoongi, asks me, making me feel slightly more at ease.

"Okay....by the way, Hyung, you have a fucking hickey on your neck!" I say, following it with a chuckle.

"I know. I was trying to fucking hide it but I guess I chose the wrong shirt with a collar that keeps slipping down. I can't believe Melina didn't say anything when I left her at the hotel. We got carried away last night," Yoongi says, smirking. He's been looking a lot happier these days.

"She's still in your hotel room?" I inquire. I welcome the change of topic, especially since I've wanted to catch up with how Yoongi is doing with this woman, Melina, he met recently...well, thanks to me.

"Yes. She actually has the day off and I told her to just relax at the hotel and that I'd arrange for one of our drivers to take her anywhere if she needed to go somewhere. She's probably still working as we speak even though I told her to just relax," he says, sounding fond about the woman he speaks of.

"Sounds like it's going well between you and Melina. It's funny how I was trying to fix her up with Jin, initially," I state, amused.

"Yes, well I never thought I would connect with her as much as I have. She's really something, Namjoon." Yoongi can't seem to hide his smile. The sight actually makes me happy for him.

"Just make the best out of the time you have with her," I advise Yoongi.

"I know. I'm trying to. I also want us to continue communicating after we go back home to Seoul. She and I discussed it last night. I'm actually willing to not see anyone else," he reveals to me and I can't help but throw him a shocked face.

"Are you serious, Yoongi-Hyung? Not even a fling?" I'm baffled.

"It's not like I've even been with anyone recently before Melina. And, there's something about her, Namjoon. I really care for her already."

"You know, what, Hyung? I support all of this. And, if you really want to pursue a long distance relationship because you think it's worth the effort, go for it. As long as the two of you continue to make each other happy, it's worth the effort," I sincerely tell him.

"Do you regret not trying to stay together with Sooyoung because of the distance?" Yoongi questions me, and I feel a lump in my throat.

I gulp as I process his question in my head more.

"I feel like we were struggling. More so, I was, because she was contacting me less when she first moved to California. But, she never wanted to end it to begin with. In a way, I feel like I gave up too easily on us. So, yes. I regret it."

Yoongi pats me on the shoulder to try and comfort me.

I wish I tried harder, back then. But, I can't turn back time. I just need to move forward.

*********

A/N:
A lot of what is mentioned about Yoongi in this chapter is part of his ff, 'Backstage Encounters.' If you haven't read it, I definitely recommend checking it out, eventually!

🎵Song to check out: "Wishful Thinking" by Benee

I appreciate you all for reading this chapter! Please vote and comment! Hugs and kisses! ✨
-MissD