xii. him

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saturday, january seventeenth, two thousand fifteenth

• • 

dress rehearsal days
were always stressful.
people running around,
messing up as a precursor
to performance nerves,
people cursing,
people stumbling.

but somehow he was calm.

• • 

he was in the front
on that little makeshift stage
where the magic happened.
where he would strum
the strings of his guitar
and let the emotion in his voice
filter through.

• • 

but this time,
he felt his concentration
drift towards the familiar figure
sitting cross-legged
on the right side of their couch,
a textbook in her hands.

• • 

he had found out a lot
about the girl with
the head full of thoughts,
swirling and mixing
and getting lost within itself.
a beautiful chaos.

• • 

although her home life
was great --
"I love my parents to death"
-- her thoughts consumed her,
and every step she took forwards
was another two steps back.

• • 

she tried to explain it
as a ball on a mountain,
teetering in the wind.
"it can go one way
or the other,"
she had said.
"and the wind is how
my anxiety tends to
portray itself."

• • 

"I don't want to
disappoint anyone.
if I had to,
I would only let
that person be myself."
she said.

• • 

he had fell silent at that,
before reaching over
and taking her hand in his,
where the silence for her
was not choking for once,
but comforting.

• • 

she found out a lot
about him too.

• • 

how his thoughts
were not stealthy and subtle
like hers,
but like a hurricane
whose only intent was
to destroy everything in its path.

• • 

how love was never a solid
foundation in his life --
"my mom left when I was three,
and the one time I thought
I was in love,
she left me because I
wasn't good enough for her"
-- and because of that, he was
always afraid to try.
how he was afraid even now.

• • 

she had leaned her head
on his shoulder,
and whispered,
"lets take the risk together"
and for once,
he was brave enough to say yes.

• • 

now, as he performed his setlist
and readied himself for the show,
he found a small joy
in the smaller things.
like how she stopped writing
furiously every few minutes
to sneak glances at him
when she thought he wasn't
paying attention.
or how she smiled suddenly
just because
and left him guessing why.

• • 

and when they traded places,
her going onto the stage,
and him claiming the left seat
of their couch,
the same occurred
and they both seemed to know it.

• • 

oh, how in too deep they both were.
but both knew it was worth it.

• • 

and when the time came
for then to take the stage together,
the final song for the night,
the result was magical.
enough that it gained
everyone's attention,
and for once they were noticed
and for once they were happy,
and for once they both believed
that love was real.

• • 

and in that fleeting moment
it was very real.

• • 

real enough
that as they packed up
their belongings
and hoisted guitars
into their hands.
and after they were
the last to leave,
the stairs creaking behind them.

• • 

he stopped her
on the third step
where she always tripped
and he always skipped,
and felt brave
for once in his life.

• • 

and he leaned in
and she closed her eyes
and the moment their lips met,
she realized she was in heaven,
and he realized that yes,
love existed.

• • 

and love was right there
beside him.
not the demons in his head,
not the fear in his heart.
just love.

• • 

just her.

-------

Next chapter is the end. I'm in tears. Let's see. If this chapter makes it to 20 votes, I'll have the final chapter posted by the end of the week (let's make it Sunday). I'm counting on you all. ;)

Comment, vote, promote.

-Isabelle

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