again and again part one - seungmin

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Again and again - Kim seungmin
Seungmin POV
I never thought I would be here, fiddling with the strap of my camera which I never use. Scratch that, I told myself to never imagine this situation ever but still here I am with a pathetic expression written all over my face.

" You're gonna stay there or are you actually going to say hi? " Y/n said still gazing at the scenery.

" Hi? "

" Ouch. Ten years of you in my life and all I get is a hi? " Y/n said and engulfed me into her arms.

Her peppermint scented deodorant still stayed the same bringing back old memories, something I was afraid of.

" How have you been? " I seem to ask not knowing how I managed to get the words out but y/n just smiles, with her eyes squinting because of the blaring sun on top of her head illuminating her face and especially her dimples.

" I've been good. Never left the town never will. What about you?" She said her smile not escaping her any soon.

" I've been here and there but it doesn't feel right. "

Because of you, I want to add but grip the hem of my jacket to try to stop myself.

Shouldn't it be easy for me? I stopped myself three years ago, when I was so sure that I had to pursue my dreams, so sure that I needed to focus with no distractions. But the way I defined distractions was how I went the wrong way.

Y/n. Her hands used to always slip in mine whenever I picked her up from her house making everyone think we were dating. The stares, the gossip, the news nothing bothered her.

Her perspective of life fascinated me, but I could never capture it , neither in my camera nor in my mind.

" Let's go. I'll show you how the neighborhood has changed. " She said slipping her hand in mine. If only I knew sooner what my fluttering heart meant.

Our journey through all the different alleys and paths of our snarky town and the different personalities helped me re-live our relationship which caused regret to stab my heart once again . The shutter of my camera and the little chuckles of y/n added to the busy roads and the upcoming sunset.

" It's getting a bit dark. I think we should leave. " I suggested only to get an immediate face of rejection from y/n.

" No way. I know this place, it's the best for sunsets. "

I hesitated. I really don't know how much my heart can handle it anymore. The rollercoaster ride my heart was riding was supposed to end a long time ago but it feels immortal.

" Oh, come on! You won't regret it! " Y/n said as she grabbed my hand but failed to even make me budge.

I couldn't help but chuckle at her efforts to drag me but eventually walked side by side, her tiny fingers never leaving the grip on my own wrist.

We went through very familiar alleyways. The same alleyways she brought me to three years ago. I felt my pace decreasing and my breath heightening with the amount of slopes and flight of stairs we had to go through.

Does she realise where she is taking me?, was the only thought going through my head.

" Omg , this brings back so many memories!! " Y/n said gripping on to the old rusty rail showing us a endless view of city lights slowly starting to show up.
But in my eyes nothing glowed brighter than the woman in front of me and I hated it.

" Oh do you remember? Like the times I'd buy ice tea only to spill it? Or like the times we'd have our own picnic here with our families? Or like-"

" Or like the time, you confessed to me, here? " I said. I couldn't keep it inside anymore.

Her brown eyes which were once filled with the reminisce of the memories us were now filled with tears and realisation.

" Seungmin I- "

" Or like the time I rejected you even though I liked you."

I saw her face change. I felt like I could finally get it out.

" Y/n. I didn't want to admit it. But now I can't not help but admit it. Time and distance would've and should've changed my feelings but it didn't. "

I took a reluctant step forward seeing that a tear slipped from Y/n's eyes.

" Or like the time you chose your passion and left us. " Another voice said making me freeze in my spot.

Hyunjin.




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