Marvel Imagines

What's Wrong With You

This part I got from a Tik Tok by @peterparkerspideytingle.  The beginning is based off of it but I added and adjusted it to be more of a story.

"What the hell is wrong with you right now, (Y/N)?!?" Your adoptive dad, Tony yells as you face plant onto the couch after one of the worst training scenarios you've ever had.

"Honestly, Dad. TOO MUCH!!!" You yell at the top of your lungs, voice and lips quivering as you do everything you can to hold back the tears burning behind your eyes, threatening to spill out.

"(Y/N)." Peter, your best friend on the avengers because he's the only one remotely close to your age of fourteen years old, and his caring nature, says quietly and with concern and worry saturating his voice. He sits down beside you on the couch and guides your head to his lap as you continue trying with all your might to hold back the tears causing your eyes to gloss over.

"Too much is wrong with me, way too much." You mumble, suddenly much quieter as you try to stabilize your emotions so you wouldn't look even weaker in the eyes of your "peers" but not really peers because most of them are at least 20 years older than you.

Steve walks over you, every step he takes slow and cautious as if you were a bomb threatening to explode. He sits down on the opposite side of Peter as your body, and begins to gently stroke your hair and comfortingly trace random shapes onto your face and neck.

"Try to calm down, (Y/N)." He whispers, you try to take it to heart and calm down.

"That's the problem, isn't it? I can't calm down, too much is wrong with me!" You argue, a point in your stomach of anger, sadness, and guilt at everything you've been through, and all you've caused the, already extremely busy and tightly wound, Avengers teammates to sacrifice for your comfort and happiness.

"You can't do anything about your past, or the trauma and issues that haunt you. You're perfect and wouldn't be you without the bad things." Peter responds, looking into your eyes with more love than that of simply "a friend" and it made you happier, but also shocked you that you were happy he liked you.

"You can't fix me or my past, not because it's "what makes me, me" but because I'm too broken to be fixed. Each little chip in my glass slowly became a pile of shattered crumbs of me, too small to glue back together. I will never be the same!" You yell, the anger overpowering the sadness and fueling the fire in your heart and making you want to stand up to face the people who said they knew you, but truly didn't know a single thing about you.

"Yes, you're right, (Y/N)." Tony interjects, matter of factly and frankly, causing all three of you to whip your heads around and gawk at Tony.

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" You argue.

"You can't put the crumbs off you back together into the original (Y/N), you're exactly correct about that. I will never be able to be the same after my kidnapping and putting an Arc reactor in my chest, let alone announcing that I was a robotic superhero to the public, but I am still one piece. I put my pieces back together, but not in the original way, I made something new out of what makes me who I am. That's all you have to do, (Y/N), allow yourself to change, become something new. I'm not telling you to change the core things that form you like your will stronger than vibranium, or your unmatched determination to help everyone you can, or your unstoppable strength and ability to protect those you love, and even those you hate, I'm saying, let the nightmares, and the trauma, and the phobias and fears make you stronger, make you better." Tony explains, you roll your eyes at his over the top, extravagant lecture-like explanation of how to survive the trauma.

"(Y/N), he's right." Steve mentions.

"Yeah right, what about trembling at the mention of the dumbest or least scary thing to exist can make me any stronger? What about getting four hours of sleep a night because I'm haunted by my own memories and every time I close my eyes, I see my parents laughing at me because I was unique and didn't act or look like them makes me more powerful?" You explode, letting every bit of anger, sadness, guilt, loneliness, and every word about your memories you don't tell anyone on the tower because you know if anyone knew, they would judge you and think you're weak.

"Every part. Look at me, my parents died, then I watched my uncle get murdered, and here I am with the powers and abilities of a radioactive spider. The only reason I didn't curl up in a ball and hide from my abilities is because the image of my uncle as he died is the only thing I see when I close my eyes, and the only thing I hear when the room is silent is what he told me, and now the words I live by. He told me "With great power comes great responsibility." That is the only thing that fuels me when I have three tests in a week and I have to survive on three hours of sleep a night because Karen told me that someone was in trouble and I stopped studying so I could help them. My trauma fuels me, yours can too." Peter argues, his face and tone of voice making it evident he cared about how I felt, and how I coped.

"Sure, you can do that! That's great, but I just can't, whatever I try, I can't do anything. I'm too far gone, there's nothing left for anyone to do for me." You complete, shrugging as you begin to stalk out of the room.

Before you can leave, the elevator doors open to reveal Wanda. She looks fine as she walks into the main room of the floor, but mere moments after stepping out of the elevator doors, she collapses into a tight ball. You whip your head around, and see Tony and Steve trying to help Wanda to her feet, and Peter standing back, a look of horror frozen on his face.

"What's wrong, Wanda?" Steve questions.

"S- so much trauma. S- so many bad mem-m-ories! I've never felt this much sadness and heartbreak ever!" She stutters out.

"What, Wanda? What do you mean?" Tony asks, confusion written like a novel all over his face.

"Peter and (Y/N) have so many traumatic and heartbreaking memories and current feelings that when they're in the same room it's incapacitating as I feel their pain. Even one of them alone would be difficult, their two of the most traumatized and pained human beings I've ever encountered, but together, I've never been in so much pain. This pain is even worse than when Pietro died, and I felt him as he died." She explains, her voice breathy and course as she pushes the words out of her mouth in her pained state.

"Well, his parents died, he watched his uncle die, got bit by a radioactive spider on a field trip, and gets bullied by the dumbest genius ever, and I. Well, I watched my parents abandon me, became a child spy/master assassin, then got electrokinesis by getting dropped onto a power line and dying four times, then got adopted by Tony Stark, only to find out that he adopted me as a cover for me joining the Avengers, and I found out I had an identical twin then, upon meeting her, I watched her get gruesomely murdered. I just thought everyone lived with the little voice that told you to die so others don't and the black hole of sadness that ruins everything, I had no idea that wasn't normal." You say, shrugging your shoulders, confused at the prospect people don't live like you have.

"Yeah, same with me, I didn't know the amount of hurt and pain I felt wasn't normal." Peter agreed.

"None of that is normal!!!!" Steve yells, a little too loudly, before correcting himself, "None of that is normal, normal is nightmares every so often, maybe a voice that wonders if the world would miss you, and hard memories, weird phobias you're accustomed to. All of that, that's not at all normal, you need to reach out and get help if that's your normal."

"Well, let's face it, none of the people that live in this compound have a normal level of trauma. None of us are 'average', we were put together as a group of remarkable people. That means that, yes, we have powers, or suits, are mutants or geniuses, but that also means we have remarkable pasts. We have nightmares about things people call 'dreams', or we shrug off memories or nightmares that average people never recover from and have nightmares of. That doesn't mean, by any stretch, (Y/N) and Peter, your trauma level isn't valid or is a normal level, because it isn't. At all." Tony says, his usually joking or sarcastic voice note serious and filled with concern.

"Oh." You and Peter say, shocked at how much you didn't know about how badly you were living compared to others.

"Mr. Stark, Sir?" F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s voice projected over the common room.

"What is it, Fri?" Tony asks the disembodied android.

"Yes!  Saved!"  Peter sighs, visibly relieved as he gestures for you to follow him as he sprinted out of the room and away from your questioning dad.

You follow him, ducking your head as you escape to Peter's room.

THE END