Her Heavy Cross

Chapter Thirty-Four

Lucy squealed and jumped up and down. Dave rolled his eyes at her and agreed it would be good to meet him.

"You know Mum will be there, right?" Dave said.

"Yeah, I know." I scoffed. "Maybe Liam will be the guy to meet her expectations finally."

Dave laughed at that, "Yeah, well, he's got money, so she should be happy about that. He's not a CEO, though, so you still might be in trouble." He was probably right.

My phone rang then, and it was Liam. I must have had a massive smile on my face because Lucy made an "ooooh" noise at me. I hushed her and went outside.

"Hey," I said, my voice was already breathy.

"Hi, Sweetheart," Liam sounded a bit groggy.

"Did you just wake up?"

"Hmm, yes. Sorry. You should have woken me up. I didn't get to say goodbye." He sounded like he was pouting.

"Yeah, I know. But you just looked so sweet laying there, snoring like a chainsaw."

"I do not snore like a chainsaw." He paused, "do I?"

I laughed, "No. You do snore, but it's pretty soft."

He laughed. Then he asked, "are you at your brother's house?"

"Yeah."

"I will let you get back to it then. Call me later tonight?"

"Yeah, I will." I paused, building up the courage to say what I wanted to say, but Liam beat me to it.

"Thank you, Lana."

"For what?"

"For forgiving my bullshit and for pushing you. For letting me get close to you. For letting me be with you. For trying to fit into my world when I know it scares you. For being you. For everything."

For once, I didn't feel like I had to make a joke or change the subject. But I also didn't know what to say. "Thank-you." It was all I had.

"Call me tonight, Sweetheart?" Liam asked again.

I agreed, then hung up.

After dinner, Perrin and I went home. I didn't feel like staying later. The kids were disappointed, but I was tired. I knew it would be a big week, and I wanted to try to get a good night's sleep.

I called Riza on the way home, and we talked a bit about the weekend. She told me a bit about her work and her arsehole boss. I asked her if I could speak to Jen for a minute.

"Sure, but why?"

"Well," I said dramatically. "I'm going to a premiere on Thursday evening, and I need someone to do my hair and make-up."

"Jen, get over here!" Riza yelled, and her voice was so loud through my car speakers that Perrin barked.

"Christ, Riz."

She laughed and said, sorry. Before she handed me to Jen, she said, "Thanks Lana, she will be so happy."

"Why will I be happy?" Jen asked. I told her, and she was quiet a minute. "Really, Lana?"

"Yeah, who else would I get to do it?"

"Can I put it on Instagram? Like a picture of you two all ready?"

I knew she would ask that. She did it for most of her clients. "Yeah, but don't mention anything about it before then. Just after I'm ready, you can put a picture up. I don't know if Liam will want to be mentioned or have a picture, but I'm happy for you to ask him."

"Oh, Lana, thank you! This could boost my business."

"I know, that's why I'm ok with it. I mean, there's going to be photos out there of me anyway, so I hope it will help you get some more work."

Jen and I talked about what I was wearing and how I wanted my hair. I told her I had no idea, so she got all excited and said she knew exactly what to do. Before I hung up, I gave Jen the address and time and told her Liam asked if Riza could come because he wanted to meet her.

"Wow, Lana. You guys are serious, huh?"

"Yeah, Jen, I think we are." We hung up not long after that.

Later that night, I called Liam, and I told him I'd sorted Jen to come over and told Dave he would come for Easter.

He seemed pleased, and we talked a bit about Riza and Jen before I told Liam I was tired and wanted to go to sleep.

I was tired, but I couldn't sleep. My brain wouldn't shut off. I kept thinking about being at school tomorrow and seeing the parents. Then I started thinking about Thursday and what Myra and the others would think of me. What it would be like to do that walk down the red carpet. I know a lot of the press will just want photos of Liam, so I'll have to stand there looking like an idiot while he poses. But worse will be when I have to stand with him. I could just imagine pictures of us, Liam looking dashing and me looking like a deer in headlights.

I started Googling how to pose on the red carpeting even got out of bed and tried a few before feeling like a total dag and getting back into bed. I wanted to back out. I didn't want to do it. I couldn't believe I had said yes to it. But I remembered Liam's face when I said I would go, and I knew that's why I had said yes.

I thought about how sweet Liam had been to me all day, how beautiful he had made me feel,  how he had tried to make the whole thing easier, how he had kissed me and held me. How he had whispered my name as we made love.

I felt the heat between my legs grow. I tossed and turned a bit, trying to make it go away. I felt hot, so I took my pyjamas off. I tossed and turned some more. I tried to ignore it but I couldn't.

I went to my draw and got out my rabbit-style vibrator. I touched myself, and I was ready for it. I closed my eyes as I slipped it inside. I thought about Liam as I did. He was thicker than my slim vibrator but just as long. I positioned its ear against my clit and put it to the setting and speed I liked.

I held it there. I thought of Liam's gravelly voice in my ear and could almost feel his breath on my neck. I let my free hand wander over my body, remembering watching as Liam touched me. I thought of how he looked at me sometimes with a small smile, his eyes dancing with amusement as his lip twitched.

As I got closer to the edge, I thought about earlier that day, the way he held me, how gentle and tender he was. I remembered how it felt as I kissed his chest and his hairs tickled my nose. I remembered his smell, earthy and masculine, like the bush after it rained. I fell over the edge when I remembered how he had called my name as he orgasmed, my own rippling through me in waves as his voice rang in my ears.

Not long after that, I finally fell asleep.

Authors note:

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