Konosuba X Male Phantom Thief Reader

Where are Palaces When you Need Them

A large slam on the table. Not the best thing to wake up to, neither is the migraine from all the drinking I've done.

"Kazuma, stop banging on the fricken table."

"Y/n, someone here wants to join the party."

I raise my head, groggy. I see a blonde woman in armour, with a wing on one side. She even had a large sword on her back, she looked like a knight.

"So... You want to join our party?"

The girl nodded, serious.

"Alrighty then, Kazuma, have fun." I drop my head back on the table.

Kazuma sighed, then began, "Listen, our party is completely useless, I would fear for your safety more than ours."

The woman began to speak, her voice sounded like a noble's, but without the over exaggerated stuck up tone, "That's the perfect party then, the truth is, although my skills allow me to be the perfect shield, I can barely swing my sword."

'What?'

Kazuma replied, "We got eaten by giant toads nearly every day."

The girl gasped, "So those girls covered in slime were with you! Now that I look at him, that man was covered in slime too, though his clothing has changed, As a crusader I..hmm... Can't allow young girls to be treated like this! I demand you let me join!"

'I would be perfectly content to let her join, if it weren't for the moaning.'

I need to get out of here, quickly, "Kazuma, can you help me get back to our home? I can't feel my legs."

'Trickster, summon Satanael, he makes you immune to poisons, such as alcohol.'

'Arsene, you should know that I'm lying, besides sometimes I want to get drunk.'

'... Ok Trickster...'

"Alright Y/N, let's get you home, sorry Darkness, but I must get my friend home."

I then got up, barely, with Kazuma's help, and we walked towards the barn.

"Thank whatever god is up there, that was really uncomfortable."

Timeskip brought to you by Arsene giving Y/n some water, while having Pixie cast dia.

The party was at the tavern. Megumin was teaching Kazuma how to use skill points and Aqua was drinking me into the ground.

Overall, a normal day... until the Crusader found us again.

Darkness, once again slammed down on the table, "So you have thought about it? You'll let me join your party?"

Kazuma instantly killed any hope of her joining, "No."

Darkness however just moaned, "Such a quick refusal!"

Suddenly, a woman called out from a distance, I looked over and saw a woman with short silver hair, beautiful purple eyes, a scar on her right cheek, wearing shorts, a green cloak, and a black crop top with only one strap over her left shoulder. "Darkness, you can't be so pushy."

"And who would you be?"

"My name is Chris, a thief."

"Oh? I'm guessing your friends with the Crusader?"

"Yeah, Darkness and I go way back. She's pretty nice, despite her quirks."

"That's... One way to put it."

I clocked out of the conversation, watching Aqua order even more alcohol.

'How can she drink that much and recover so quickly?'