hell or flying | Chaelisa

Chapter 11

Or maybe just the thought I was actually married baffled her, and she wanted to know more about how that happened. Especially considering that I've got married to a man after I've sworn to hate all male species, the second we entered high school and was probably the biggest lesbian the Korean has ever known. Yeah, I couldn't blame her. I would be pretty damn surprised too.

Despite understanding where all the questions came from though, I kept my answers short and only answered the questions she asked. So this way, Jisoo knew that it was actually my parents' last wish that I at first only complied with, but grew to love as I met the "love of my life". I told her about our beautiful wedding that I for sure haven't spent in suspense, seconds away from breaking down right at the altar. And about our even more beautiful honeymoon in Hawaii, on one of the private islands his family owned, being sexually used as much as he pleased.

Faking a smile as I recalled all those memories was single-handedly one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, especially since I was feeding all these lies to my best friend. Because once again, I failed to trust her completely. I knew she wouldn't sit idly if she knew the truth, and though I was deceiving her; I knew it was better this way. No one could know. Not even her. It was too much of a risk. Besides, there was nothing she or anyone else could do about it, other than stir trouble.

Apparently, I misjudged her because even after being apart for so long, she seemed to know me more than I thought as she looked utterly not convinced. However, she shrugged her shoulders as I gave her the best smile I could muster up, and let it go, seemingly believing my lie, at least to a certain extent. As long as she didn't pry, that was enough for me.

So now that I've come over to her and Jennie's place for the first time since moving to NYC, there was no awkwardness between us as we stood in the middle of their hallway in a hug that went on for clearly much longer than Jennie would like. Judging from the way she was eyeing us from where she still stood by the door. And so with a nervous chuckle, I peeled the older woman off, before Jennie stepped in and revoked her words from when she came to visit me for the first time and called me a friend. I really didn't want to push our friendship, seeing as I was already skating on thin ice with the way I've destroyed her best friend.

A satisfied smile made its way up to her face as soon as Jisoo was out of my embrace, and she walked over to me, pulling me into a short hug, "Hey, Jen," I greeted the taller wife, and looked at her with a friendly smile. I resisted the urge to whisper, "I'm married too, Jen. Remember?" into her ear as I pulled away because Jisoo was just as possessive as Jennie. And well, I wished I wasn't, so I preferred not mentioning it, or even thinking about it, really.

"We're glad you could make it," Jennie smiled, as she and Jisoo led me into their huge living room, hand in hand.

"Yeah, me too," I didn't mention how I had to sneak out of the apartment as soon as Chanyeol drove to work, and I was left alone once again.

I failed to tell him about my reconnection with my old friends, and though I had time to, I couldn't find the courage. Just like with Jennie, I was on thin ice with Chanyeol as well.

Ever since we moved here, he pointed out several times my change in attitude and recently, not just verbally, as more purple bruises found a home on my skin. After the way I behaved at the office when he gave me a tour, I've only made the whole situation worse. As he said, everyone now knew what a good for nothing I was, and he was ashamed to even show his face around. I didn't listen to a single word he said to me and defied his wishes, even ran out in the middle of a conversation like a junkie. Everyone would now think I couldn't wait anymore and had to take my dose or something.

I wasn't quoting, since those weren't exactly the words he used, but I preferred sugarcoating it in my mind rather than remembering the harsh words he used. Either way, that visit seemed to fuck everything up even more than it already was, and so even though weeks have passed since then, I was still paying the price.