Hoping that those of you who wanted this final chapter, still want it LOL. Thank you for your patience. I lost the motivation along the way for sure, but happy to put Real to a close. Thank you and good bye everyone :) Maybe I'll garner the drive to create something new - Catch y'all later 🫂
I waited a few minutes after Celena walked out. Pressing my fingertips together in an anxious wait. A few women walked in and out of stalls. I stayed leaned against the sinks patiently waiting. My heart was thumping. There were plenty of people here right? The chances of us crossing paths was super low.
About 7 minutes had passed, I felt like this was probably a sweet spot. I slowly dragged my feet away from the sinks and towards the door to exit. It felt like weights were tied around my ankles, it was impossible to confidently walk out. I took a deep breath before turning the corner to the exit. I gasped seeing Celena still standing there. She turned around and faced me, making a strange look at me. I furrowed my brows right back at her, equally confused. Austin was no where in sight.
Celena walked up to me and grabbed my hands.
"I don't know where the fuck he went"
My heart dropped.
"What do you mean? I thought he was waiting for you?"
"I mean, He said he was!"
I could feel my knees shake nervously. It felt like there was a shark hunting and I was swimming in the middle of the ocean.
"Fuck."
Celena looked around behind me as I fought my own internal battle.
I looked at my phone, it was almost 1am, surely now would be an appropriate time to go to bed?
I walked over to Sam and Andrew, who were seated at the wedding party table. Sam looked up at me and smiled brightly. She looked so radiant.
"Mel! Are you having a good time?"
I smiled as best as I could, putting my worries on a back burner.
"Yes, this party is amazing . I'm so happy for you guys!"
She smiled back at me, warmly.
"Sorry we can't really hang out, I'm meeting so many of Andrews family in person for the first time - It's honestly overwhelming.."
She laughed nervously.
"No, It's totally fine.. I think I'm actually going to head to my room now"
Sam looked at her phone, that was faced down on the table. She widened her eyes.
"Oof! 1am, no wonder I'm exhausted right now. Well, I'll see you tomorrow at the pool right? Around noon?"
I nodded back at her.
"I'll be there. Love you, have a great rest of the party!"
"Love you more!"
I turned around, heading towards the exit. I looked around side to side trying to see if he was still around somewhere. I could see Celena darting through the crowd also trying to find him. She found me instead and came speed walking up to me.
"I don't think he's even in the reception hall anymore.."
I shrugged, not much else we could do about that. I was just happy to be heading to my room to call it a day. Maybe I'd probably see him tomorrow, if they're staying here.
"Well maybe he went to your guys' room?"
"Maybe.. We aren't staying at this resort. All the celebs attending the wedding stay at the huge resort down the beach"
Relief crashed onto me, thank god. I couldn't handle seeing him tonight.
"I'm going to head to my room now. I loved talking with you. If you guys are going to be here awhile, I'd love to hang out some more.. Just you, obviously"
I half laughed, feeling embarrassed.
Celena smiled warmly at me and placed her hand on my arm.
"I'll text you"
I nodded, reaching towards her to give her a nice hug before walking out of the reception hall.
I tried my best to walk straight to my room, but I couldn't deny that the alcohol was coarsing through me like a river. Everything felt like a shady haze coming in and out, everytime I blinked it felt like I was sleeping. My room was on the other side of the resort, by the beach where the wedding was. I was almost there, I just needed to walk past the pool.
It was so late, no one was on the resort. All the night owls were out at one of the clubs on site and early birds were fast asleep in their rooms, no one was roaming around.
The water on the pool looked so still, with fading rainbow lights, slowly transitioning underwater.
I finally walked away from the pool area and was beginning to turn the corner to my room.
What would I have even done if I saw Austin tonight, It's been so long, who even cares about what happened. I'm sure that hes moved on from me. I had seen several tabloid posts about him dating a few other girls. Why was it so hard for me to move on and so easy for him?
Ugh, fuck
I reached up and wiped my eyes. Fuckin idiot. You sound like a desperate girl throwing yourself a pity party, its been so long. Why are you still doing this?
While my eyes were shut, I thought I was taking a forward step, when in fact I stepped right into the dirt on the side of the walk way, slipping onto the plants.
I simply couldn't even move, Thank god there's no one out right now.
I positioned myself so that I was leaning back into the palms of my hands, before hoisting myself up from the floor. I stood up, and clapped my hands together to get rid of the dirt on them.
"Fuckin' Idiot."
I said aloud to myself.
I felt a sting on my knee and looked down to see a huge gash across my shin. Of course..
I straightened my back and threw my head back in defeat.
That's going to be interesting to have to explain tomorrow.
I took a moment to decide what I would do next. My room was only about another 5 minute walk from here, but I felt like it was important to wash the gash in the ocean, let the sea salt run over it before I just went to the hotel room bleeding like this.
I decided that was the smarter choice.
I reached down and unbuckled my heels, Slipping them off and placing my bare feet on the tile. I began to walk towards the water, it wasnt so far, I was right at the bend, right where Sam and Andrew just got married.
As I placed my feet in the sand, I could feel the cool sand surround my toes, but also felt the resistance of my walking as the sand held me back. It felt like it was telling me not to go.
I reached the water and lifted my dress as I walked in about knee height, feeling the ice cold water run over me. It felt amazing.
The air was so still and quiet, the only sounds were the soft waves crashing back and forth. I looked out into the black of the horizon. Simply meditative.
"Yo, you gotta be careful, it's dangerous to be in the water at night, girl"
My body tensed. I know that voice, but I was praying to the gods that it wasn't him.
Albeit super drunken, but definitely his voice.
"Are you good?"
I took a heavy sigh and turned my body sideways to look up at the owner of the voice. I clenched my dress tighter when it turned out to be true.
It was Austin..
His expression softened when he realized it was me.
We stared back at each other for what felt like lifetimes.. The sounds of the waves filling the empty space between us.
"I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was you."
Yikes. I nodded and looked down and away from him.
"N-No! Not that I didn't want it to be you or that it being you would make me not warn you about the dangers of the water and the night and yknow the shit!"
I looked back up at him and laughed nervously at how foolish he still was. We were both clearly intoxicated. It's kind of humorous the way we left would be the way we met again.
"It's fine"
He nervously chuckled.
"You look so different, I didn't even recognize you.."
I nodded, I did.
"Your hair is so long.."
I smiled at him.
"Yours too.."
He smiled back at me warmly. A heavy silence fell between us again.
I felt my feet start to get dragged down into the sand from the back and forth of the waves, I kicked off the wet sand and began to exit the water. Austin stretched his hand out to help me. I smiled at him and shook my head politely declining. He withdrew slowly, watching me handle myself.
I dropped the hem of my dress and let it fall as I was finally out of the water, I wiped my hands off on my dress and sighed, finally back on the dry sand.
"How come you left Cel by herself in there?"
Austin laughed.
"I texted her that I was going to take a walk? I guess she didn't look at her phone"
"Weren't you supposed to be waiting for her outside the bathroom?"
He quirked his brow at me.
"Okay, girl, you know a little too much right now"
We both laughed.
"I saw her in the bathroom you ass"
He nodded his head.
"Yeah I know.. She texted me when she saw you walk in"
I looked at him quizzically.
"Wait she saw me before I saw her?"
He nodded.
"Yeah"
"She's so slick.."
Austin let out a breathy laugh.
"She is."
A moment of silence..
"So plus one, huh? I heard that you were seeing someone, but I didn't realize it would be Celly!"
"What?!"
Austin shot me a crazed look.
"Nah nah, I know you know me and Celena are not a thing. Don't play!"
I smiled st him.
"Is that so crazy?"
He nodded excessively.
"Uh? yeah? She's engaged now you know."
I widened my eyes.
"I didn't! That's so great for her. Aw.."
"Yeah, she just convinced me to come tonight, and I told her I'd only come if she came with me"
I nodded.
"I guess that makes sense.. How come you didn't want to come?"
A silence fell between us again.
"Probably the same reason you wouldn't want to come.."
"Damn you really didn't want to see me, huh?"
Austin scoffed.
"Seriously, Mel? You're the one who told me you never wanted to see me again."
I rolled my eyes angrily.
"You cheated on me."
Another heavy silence fell between us. It felt like the sounds of the waves were getting louder and louder.
"It doesn't even matter anymore."
I turned and began to walk back towards the paths that led to the rooms. I could hear Austin's heavy steps in the sand follow behind me.
"Wait-"
He grabbed my elbow, stopping me from going forward. It felt like electricity running through the veins in my arms. I tensed. Turning around to look at him.
"I'm sorry.. And I know that an apology means shit to you now. But, I'm fucking sorry.. I can't change what I did and you're completely right for throwing me in the trash and leaving that night. I fucking suck. And I didn't deserve you.. You were always amazing to me. Always warm and patient and logical to be honest.. I should have listened to you in the beginning and never pushed so hard on you to be my girlfriend.. I'm selfish, I couldn't share you"
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, slowly letting it out.
"I don't want your apology. It happened, it's over. You cheated on me, what reasoning would you have for doing so? It's fine. You didn't love me enough to stay faithful to me. That's pretty much all there is to that."
He clenched my elbow tighter.
"No, I love you so fucking much it hurts to even look at you right now"
I scowled at him.
"You didn't then, and you sure as hell couldn't possibly love me right now."
I snatched my elbow out of his grasp and kept walking through the sand. I could hear him still following me.
"I was a fucking mess when you left me! I passed out on stage, I started doing a lot more drugs, I had to cancel the entire tour because Dre couldn't stop finding me piss drunk and smacked out of my mind! And I know it's all a product of what I did. I know!! And I only have myself to blame for everything going down the way it did, but I loved you so god damn much, Mel. Staring at you now, even as you're walking away from me right now, I'm just falling back in love with you again.. How long am I going to keep getting crucified for my fuckin' moment of weakness?!"
I shot around to look at him.
"You will NEVER get to love me again. This is your punishment for your 'moment of weakness'. You fucking idiot! Who the fuck calls cheating a moment of weakness? It was an active choice to fuck someone else. It was YOUR decision to throw everything we had away. You don't get a another chance, don't you understand?"
We made it to the pavement and I turned the corner to walk to my block of rooms. Austin was still hot on my tail.
"I'm not excusing what I did, I know I can't. It's been so long, Mel.. I'm different, I'm clean, I don't drink as much anymore.. I'm trying to be a better person!"
"These are all just words, Austin. And I don't care to hear them to be honest."
I reached my door and fumbled to grab my key card. I felt Austin's hands on my shoulders and was suddenly spun around, my back against my door.
We stared at each other intensely for what felt like forever.
"..don't you think about me..?"
His tone changed, and his body relaxed. I looked down and away from his gaze.
"..I did.. for awhile.. but I don't anymore."
"Not anymore?"
"Well.. I couldn't keep living my life mourning our relationship. So, I started dating again.."
He put his forearm against the door, it felt like I was being engulfed by him, the smell of his cologne and alcohol laying around me like a blanket.
"And how did dating go? What asshole is your plus one tonight?"
I rolled my eyes and tried to push him away from me, he caught my hand in his and held it there.
"..well, what does it feel like to be with me again..?"
I shook my head.
"we're not doing this."
He held my hand tighter against his chest.
"Tell me."
"no."
"Don't deny it. I know you feel it too."
"No.. I'm better than this."
He leaned down, his cheek grazing against mine.
"Melissa, I love you. I haven't stopped."
"You need to go."
I slid out of his grasp and shoved him away from me. My knees wobbling like a new born calf. Of course I loved him still. But we weren't good for each other. Over this time, I learned that. We shouldn't be together, no matter how hard our minds, bodies, and souls connected. It almost felt natural, like an instinctual connection. Our hearts attracted like magnets, the force was unbearable. And no matter how beautiful it could be, it was only meant to end in torture.. So, I needed to take a page from Mel's infinite book of wisdom and just close the door and leave for good. It was never meant to be bigger than this. Just like the first time.
"Mel-"
I turned my head one last time to look at him before I left him. But before I could even think, a large, firm hand grabbed the back of my head and the small of my back and pulled me forward, so that my body was pressed up against the one in front of me, forcing our lips together.
It felt like heaven on earth.
As my head was gently released, we pulled our bodies apart and stared at each other, not a single word left to speak.
Fin.
