Love, Drugs, and High School

Chapter Ten

          I knew exactly what this party entailed, but I pretended that I didn’t care. The only thought that came to my mind was that Annabelle would be upset. If she was here, she would tell me not to go.

          This strange mood that I was in that I just couldn’t shake. I guess one hard-core party would have to change that.

          When I got to the party, it was in full swing. I was never one that would be the first to a party. If anything, I was usually the last.

          “Hey,” Tommy greeted me. “Wait to greet my brother until he’s drunk. He doesn’t know that I had some of my high school friends come. He would freak that I ruined his ‘all college’ party.” I released a small, uneasy laugh and leaned against the staircase.

          “How’s it been?” Tommy asked me. Before I could answer, someone turned the lights off, causing the girls to scream.

          “Ok,” I lied.

          “You’ve never been a good liar.” Tommy laughed. He passed me something in the dark. It was a joint. I smiled inwardly, inhaling deeply.

          “That’s because I’ve never had much to lie about,” I replied, passing it back to Tommy after taking a few long drags.

          “Lucky, my parents would kill me if they knew only half of it. My life would be totally screwed over.”

          “I don’t have that problem,” I said, wishing deep down that I did, maybe then I wouldn’t be the same person. Maybe then, none of my mistakes would have happened. None of the problems in my life would really exist. Tommy had a pretty sheltered life, yet it was his choice to change that.

FLASHBACK

          “RYAN!” My mother’s voice yelled down to me. “Get the hell down here!” I sighed, walking down the stairs to see my mother, beer bottle in hand. My mother wasn’t even classy enough to drink wine. She drank beer, probably more than she should.

          “You’re father left again.” She said apathetically.

          “Again,” I said, trying to take it all in. Sometimes, I wondered why he even came back.

          “I want dinner,” I nodded walking over to the phone, getting ready to order pizza. “No, no, no, I want you to MAKE me dinner.” She turned and walked away, plopping herself down on the couch.

          Taking out a pot, I poured water in it and started to boil it. Pasta and sauce it would be tonight. When everything was done, it was hard for me to hold back the pride in my meal.

          When I brought it to my mother, though, it wasn’t the same story. “You made pasta AGAIN? How much damn pasta do you want me to eat before I die?” But she accepted the bowl though, and ate all of it.

          Taking the bowl from her, she waved her hand at me, as if shooing me, telling me that I was dismissed. Thankful that I got to get away from her, I watched out my window, waiting for my dad to come home. He always came back home.

          A spark of happiness shot through me when I saw him pull into the drive way about two hours later. When he got in the house, I hurried to the closet where I could hear their conversation. The only real reason that I actually stood in there and listened was in hope that one day my dad would say, “I want to take Ryan with me.”

          “You’re back,” my mother said in a cold tone.

          “Not for long. Not this time.” He was holding something in his hand; a duffel bag. “I’m leaving.”

          “Fine, then get your shit and leave. I don’t need you.”

          I watched my father pack up his things, not taking a single picture of me with him. No remembrance of me.

          “You can keep Ryan. He’s just like me; he doesn’t give a shit about you!” My father said as he stormed off.

          “Wait dad!” I screamed, jumping out of the closet.

          He turned back to look at me, but shook his head. “Have fun living with that monster.” He left me. He left me alone with my mother.

          “You little shit! You were listening to our whole conversation, weren’t you?” That was such a stupid question. Of course I was. What did she think I was doing in there? Looking for a rain coat? But I didn’t say anything, afraid that my mother would hit me.

          “You were! I knew it!” She yelled, coming over and punching me. It didn’t really hurt, but it did hurt when she threw the kitchen chair, hitting me straight in the chest.

          “Hey,” Tommy said, “you’ve been awful quiet.”

          “Nothing to really talk about, now is there,” I said as Tommy passed it back over to me. There was nothing to talk about. Nobody knew why I was the way I was and I doubt anyone would give a shit anyways.

          That led my thoughts back to Annabelle. She was the reason I was here; to get so high that I couldn’t remember anything. I wanted more than anything to forget what I said to her earlier. Forget everything; meeting her, kissing her. If I just forgot, then maybe I wouldn’t feel this way.

          Police sirens went off, shaking me out of my thoughts and causing me to run along with all of the other party goers. Getting caught by the police was the last thing I wanted to do.

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A/N

Sorry for the really long wait for an update. I promise that that will not happen again. School is keeping me super busy and I'm just so busy :) Well I hope that you like this chapter :) Let me know if you like it, have any ideas for it, anything! I like hearing from you!

SNEAK PEAK

*Ryan and Annabelle meet again, even after their fight* what will happen?*

Comment on what you think will happen!

 P.S.

If you really want to know how Ryan is feeling, you should listen to the song I added. It's called Save Yourself by My Darkest Days. They are fantastic so you should check some of their other stuff out but Save Yourself is without a doubt Ryan's song to Annabelle