I Love This Boy | On Hold

Chapter 11: Only Gay for You

Hannie was still in shock. Still in shock days after the incident with Taebin. After that, nothing else out of the ordinary occurred between the two of them. In fact, Hannie hadn't seen Taebin much at all since then. The elder found himself busy with college again, not that Hannie minded, he still needed more time to process what had happened between them.

He knew that Taebin was probably just messing around, just taking the piss after discovering that he was gay. Well, finding out that he was kissing Minnie, at least.

Hannie still couldn't believe that Taebin would be okay with him being gay. Nor could he believe that Taebin would kiss him because he actually liked him. Because of this, he had created a distorted view of what had happened, refusing to believe what was now obvious. Taebin didn't really like him, he couldn't. No, Taebin was just teasing him, making fun of him for kissing another boy. Yes, that's what it was. It was all nothing but a sick joke.

Except it really wasn't.

By the time Taebin came back to hang out with Jun, he had expected to have Hannie wrapped around his finger. What he found instead, however, was that Hannie was avoiding him again.

The younger had returned to his cold stares and lack of speech. Taebin didn't know what he had done wrong. He was sure Hannie liked him, at least he thought he was. Maybe he didn't and maybe Taebin had it all wrong. Maybe he misread the tension between them and took it too far.

You see, both of the boys had begun to doubt themselves. They had begun to doubt each other. They were second-guessing everything.

Hannie knew that he couldn't confront Taebin but Taebin knew that he wouldn't be able to get close to Hannie again if they didn't at least talk about it.

He wanted to talk to the younger, but he couldn't get rid of Jun. He loved hanging out with his best friend, but he had something more important to do. He needed to speak to Hannie.

As the hours passed by, Hannie stayed in his room. The door was locked to avoid a run-in with the elder and his headphones were at full volume as he lied in bed. His eyes were closed, feet tapping along to the tune as he tried to think about something, anything, other than Moon Taebin.

He didn't hear the knocking on his door when Taebin finally caught his lucky break. He was going to talk to Hannie, he was going to apologise for the other day. He was going to clear everything up and make it all okay again.

If only Hannie heard him knocking the door.

After a moment, he gave up. He knew Hannie was ignoring him and he thought he had messed it all up. He thought he had ruined everything. He just wanted to fix it.

He left early that day and Hannie didn't see him again until the weekend.

They were eating dinner. Hannie was just as quiet as usual, more so even, because He felt sick. Sick to his stomach.

He quickly excused himself, saying that he didn't feel well as he rushed upstairs to his room. Jun stood to go after his brother, wondering what had him in such a state.

"Don't. I've got this. I think I know what's wrong," Taebin explained, wasting barely a second in going after the boy.

Jun was confused, he knew that Taebin and Hannie never really got along. He figured Taebin must have done something to upset his brother somehow and so, he allowed him to go and fix whatever mistake he had made. It wasn't the first time Hannie had been pissed off because of Taebin. It was, however, the first time he looked pale as he sat across from him.

Taebin heard the door close and quickened his pace, hoping to get to the door before Hannie could lock it. He wasn't so lucky.

"Come on, Hannie. Let me in, please?" He coaxed from outside, hoping the younger would at least hear him out.