Curves and Love

Chapter 15

Iris pov*

I felt her eyes on me, after a moment she cleared her throat and started with a weak voice

"I know... that whatever I say or the number of times I would apologize it won't be enough...but you have to believe me Iris I am so ashamed of myself and terribly sorry"

I didn't reply or look at her but from the corner of my eye I could see her with her hands on her face.

"I didn't know what happened or how I was able to let out this horrible words out of my mouth but please Iris I beg you to forgive me" Charlotte said

I let out a deep breath and decided to reply without giving her a stare

"But me I know, you said what you said because deep down that's what you think of me, your anger just helped you express your thoughts"

"No no it's not true" She spoke quickly

"You are right I was angry and... jealous but I told all these words because I felt myself in danger. So I chose the ease and lowered you to gain confidence...not because I thought this of you on the contrary you are the total opposite" She added

"Don't get tired and try to comfort me because I know that what you said on this evening was the bitter reality, you are not the first one who said these words to me, I've been used to it since I was a teenager... Do you want to know what really hurt me?" I asked

I saw her walking to me and standing in front of me.

"I thought you are my friend, I thought you knew me but once again I was wrong. Every time I give my trust to somebody, the situation ended the same way. Every one hurt me in the end. I wanted to believe that it will be different now that I am adult and the person can look over my appearance and appreciate me for who I really am... but you proved me wrong again. You doubted me and thought so little of me you hurt me so much Charlotte because I trusted you... so you are right whatever you say won't bring my trust back" I said looking at her for the first time. She was crying but her tears didn't affect me. I felt nothing for the first time I was indifferent.

She kneeled in front of me and said

"I am your friend even if you don't believe it, I... I reacted this way because I thought my friend betrayed me so it was more painful... I know it's not an excuse but this is the truth. I couldn't forget what I said and if I could I would give everything I have to go back and erase this terrible moment." She hiccupped.

"Please Iris please forgive me and give me a second chance" She begged with her hands on my knees.

I turned my head away letting her know my answer I didn't want nothing to do with her.

"After that evening I felt so lonely, you were hurt, my parents didn't look at me or speak with me and Evan... he didn't even want to hear my voice" She added closing her eyes.

Did she want me to feel sorry for her? She is the one to blame her and her brother. Like Evan said it was not my fault.

Like she heard me she said

"I know I am the only one responsible but you have to believe that your pain caused my pain too and I won't forgive myself until you forgive me"

"I am sorry but I think I can't do this the wound is still deep" I replied standing up walking away from her. She sighed, wiped her tears and said

"I hope one day you can find the strength to forgive me and I will wait this day impatiently, I didn't lie when I said I consider you as my friend and I really want for you to feel the same again."

She seemed honest and really sorry I couldn't deny it but like I said I am so hurt that even if I want I couldn't forgive her. I didn't expect that from her so the shock was more violent.

When she saw that I didn't speak she walked to the couch and took her bag. Before walking out of the door she turned around

"You have to know that Adam was not the same from this day too, even he didn't express it but I know my brother he is like... lost, he locked himself in refusing to share the pain I see in his eyes..."

I let out a breath out when I heard the door close.

I walked to my bathroom and washed my face with cold water. Looking at my face at the mirror I reminded the moment when I woke up in the Clark's house.

Flashback

He was laid next to me sleeping. I got out of bed trying to don't wake him up. He was the last person I expected to see. Why is he here? He was part of this drama and now he was sleeping next to me. This man is unbelievable. I took my shoes in my hands and my purse which was on the bedside and walked away. I didn't want to talk to him or hear nothing from him or anyone. The house was empty all the guest were gone. I had almost managed to get out without being seen until Mrs Clark called me.

"Iris honey where are you going"

I sighed and turned around

"To home" I replied

"I think you are not in the right state to drive dear" Melinda said worried

"I am fine don't worry"

"My mum is right, let me drive you off"

I stooped walking when I heard Adam's voice behind me. I turned to him giving him a glare and walked away without a word I was glad he didn't follow me, the look I gave him dissuade him for sure. I run to my car. Once home he called me so many times and ended sending me a message to make sure I was safe of course I didn't respond.

The following days he kept calling me and sending me messages to know if I was good even if I never replied. The last one was yesterday he wrote

"I hope you feel better, take all the time you need but I hope to see you soon because it is not the same without you in the office"

I knew he didn't care he was just guilty and need me for work but after what Charlotte said I started to doubt. Was he really affected? 

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