What Could've Been

1.5

Lindsey left his babies reluctantly and now they were in 1987. He knew about this incident though he didn't really remember it because recording Tango in the Night, was not a good time for any of them. He was withdrawn from the whole thing as was Stevie, and he was heavily relying on Alcohol to just get through a recording session. 

He and Barbara were in the corner staring at the group of five people in Christine's living room. They were having a band meeting and everyone, everyone was on edge. 

"So we have the tour dates booked, now we just need to pick a time to start rehearsals. The Shake the Cage tour is set to start on September 30th, and we're in Kansas so I was thinking that we fly out to Kansas on the fifteenth, and that way we'd have straight fifteen days to get everything ready and perfected. Hell, we could even rehearse in Maui and then fly out together on the 28th." Mick brings up.

"I'd prefer Maui as I live there...but the fifteenth is fine." John shrugs.

"I'm good with that." Christine nods.

"Me too. Maui sounds nice." Stevie smiles.

"Lindsey?" 

"No." Young Lindsey answers.

"No?" Mick asks.

"No." He repeats.

"Well did you just want to join us in Kansas on the 28th, I don't think that's very smart but I mean..." Mick trails off.

"No, I mean no...I'm not going on this tour. I can't do it. I'm tired, I have solo stuff that I have to do...I thought it was a good idea, but I just. I can't...I can't do a tour where I'm not happy, where Stevie's fucking killing herself. I'm not doing that again. I'm done. I quit. I'm leaving Fleetwood Mac." 

Stevie has once said in an interview that Lindsey vaguely remembers that the reason she flew off the couch and slapped him and started beating on him was a reaction to the remorse and the feelings of "I should've left Fleetwood Mac after we broke up because they didn't want me they just wanted you". But they were watching it. Lindsey and Barbara were watching as she screamed and flew off the couch and over the coffee table. They watched as she smacked him across the face first and then shoved him back into the fireplace he was leaning against, and then she started repeatedly banging on his chest with her angry tiny fist, tears and makeup streaming down her face. 

But the scariest thing was watching Young Lindsey's eyes go from a dull, lifeless, grey to a very menacing dark blue and his body went tense. He used all the strength he had to shove her off of him. They watched as she fell into the coffee table and then they watched as he started kicking her and grabbing her wrists as she screamed and fought against him. The watched as she kneed him in the stomach before getting out of his grasp and sprinting down the hall of Christine's maze-like house, they followed along with all the twists and turns, and then they were in the driveway and they watched as Lindsey finally caught up with her and grabbed her waist throwing her, literally picking her up and throwing her against the hood of the car, the hood ornament wedged into her spin before it dented under her weight and then they watched as his hands made their way around her neck and started squeezing. Her eyes bulging out of her head, her fingernails scratching and drawing blood out of his hands.

"When...my dad...and my...brother...find out...they...will...track...you down...and they....will...kill...you." She grits out before John grabbed Lindsey's arms and used all of his weight to pull Lindsey off of her. 

John then pinned him to the wall of the house by the collar and he got close to his face. "I think it's best you leave." 

And Young Lindsey did, he got in the now dented Mercedes and he squealed out of the driveway and onto the street. 

"What could you have done differently?" Barbara asked looking at him like she was scolding her child. 

"I just want to say it was self-defense, she attacked me first." He pouts.

"Okay, that's fine, but what could you have done differently?" 

"Well, I shouldn't have choked her...But I was so drunk Barb, I don't remember doing it. I just remember hearing about it in Interviews." 

"Okay, so there's your second thing." She points out.

"What I shouldn't have drank." He sighs.

"Correct." She nods.

"Well, I guess I did drink an awful lot. Please don't tell me I have to go relive that car accident with Cheri?" 

"No, this isn't about Cheri. Anything else." 

"I guess I could've been a little bit more honest. I stopped getting excited halfway through Tango and I shouldn't have just sprung it on them like that, I should've told them a little bit further in advance, I just didn't know how to do it." Lindsey sighs. 

"Alright, back to the hospital we go.  Like I said earlier, you are out of heart surgery but you're in a coma. It's rare that a patient slips into a coma after heart surgery...but you did, don't ask me why. I don't know, I know it wasn't a stroke though. I'm assuming it had to do with a reaction to the anesthesia and your epilepsy medicine because you seized right after they brought you to ICU, You'll be in limbo for a while, you can just watch yourself sleep in the hospital, you can go be with your wife and kids at home or hell. Stevie's at her Condo, you could go see her. Just know that wherever you are, I'll be back first thing in the morning." Barbara takes his hand again and she disappears, Lindsey flashes to his ICU room. It was really late, as the night sky was streaming in through the window, but what shocked him the most was that Leelee, was the one sleeping on the couch in his ICU room. 

He just sighed and sank down to the floor next to her and watched her, not daring to look at his lifeless body in the bed. And while he was watching Leelee, he thought about Lily, and somehow she popped right into his arms. He laughed lightly as she snuggled up with her. Barbara briefly flickered in the back of his mind, "You can only have one with you, but she goes away as soon as I come back in the morning." 

He smiled at Lily in his arms with her little blonde curls. She looked almost exactly like him save for her mother's blonde color. 

"Well, Lee this is the peanut I named you for." He sighs knowing that Leelee can't hear him.