What Could've Been

1.4

Barbara bends down and picks up one of the babies that are crawling around. "Meet Lilian Rebecca Buckingham, her miscarriage baby."

He takes her into his arms and his eyes go wide. He cradles her close and then he kisses her and the little girl, knowing it's her father nuzzles into his chest.

"So we have three more together. Stevie and I?" He asks.

"Teedee had four abortions and two miscarriages...This baby is from her 1978 abortion. It's a little girl, she named her Luna Marie Buckingham." The second baby that Barbara points out looks exactly like Stevie, but the eyes are unmistakenly his. She reaches up for him, also recognizing like her big sister that that was her father, and he sets Lily down doing the same thing that he did with Lily to Luna.

"This is Sara Rhiannon Nicks-Henley...1979, she wasn't going to let this baby just have Don's last name...because there's just something about you...that she never got with anyone else. Joe Walsh's baby was a miscarriage. Michael Joseph Nicks-Walsh, after Mick and Joe. 1983." She points to a fourth baby in the pen. 

"Number Five?" He asks.

"Number Five was also Joe Walsh. This was an abortion and his name is Bradley Jess Nicks-Walsh 1985. Emma Kristin, Joe's daughter that passed away in that car accident...she comes and plays with them every once in a while. 

"Six?" Lindsey questions.

"Six and Seven are twins...1997." Barbara looks at him.

"What?" His mouth falls open.

"Stevie found out she was pregnant the night that Kristen told you and the rest of Fleetwood Mac that she was having William. Literally after that concert that night and you guys parted ways, her telling you that you needed to be with Kristen for William...you didn't fight her, You went to be with Kristen and then she took like ten pregnancy tests. Poor Karen had been out all night getting them for her.  At that point, we all knew that you two were back together and planning a future. She had told me she was thinking about freezing her eggs so in the future when you guys did settle down together that you could have children.  I think the twins hurt her the most though because that was her last chance at being a mother. The reason they are twins is because when a woman hits her mid-forties she starts releasing more than one egg in a cycle. They were her menopause babies.  As far as I'm aware she doesn't even know she had twins. I went with her to this abortion. I didn't want to, God knows I tried to talk her out of it, but when her mind is made up, it's made up...before they do an abortion they do an ultrasound and I saw the twins on the screen. The doctor was going to say something but I just shook my head and held her hand. When she was out cold the doctor asked why I didn't want her to know. I just said it would be better for all of us. She did...ironically...she named him Gregory Lindsey after you and your brother...when William was born and you said that his middle name was Gregory, it stabbed her in the heart. This little miss, I named...because Stevie didn't know about her. I named her Daisy Belle. Stevie had named her imaginary friend when she was little Daisy Belle so I thought it'd be a good fit." Barbara smiles.  

"I wish I could hold all four of them." 

"We can try...Daisy and Gregory tend to not like to sit still, they're too much like their parents but I know Luna and Lily aren't horrible in the holding department. Jess, Ruth, Morris, and I are here a lot with them." She nods.

"Really?" Lindsey smiles.

"Yep...we actually just missed your mom and dad...I had to do that on purpose. Come on, take a seat." 

He obeys and sits against the corner of the pen and one by one she brings the babies over to him. Gregory is first and she sits him in the crook of Lindsey's left arm. Gregory struggles and starts crying.

"Now Gregory, that's no way to greet your father, you've gotta behave young man." Lindsey scolds, and Gregory knowing the tone of his father's voice is firm and of disappointment, he settles with a pout almost identical to Stevie's on his face. 

The next one she brought over was Daisy, and much like her twin she fought against sitting still also but Lindsey did the same thing to Daisy that he did to Gregory. 

"Now Daisy, you need to settle and get comfy like your big brother did. Daddy's not going to be too happy if you don't." Daisy huffs but stills and brings her fist up to her mouth and starts sucking on it. 

"Oh yeah, you're definitely my kid. I've put my fist and my foot in my mouth countless times, especially dealing with your mother." He chuckles kissing her little head. 

Next Barbara brought Luna over to him and she settled laying face down on his chest next to Daisy and Lily when she was brought over, took up the spot next to her brother.

"God Barb, these are my kids. I have seven fucking kids." He chuckles.

"You do...you look good with babies Lindsey. Sexy." She smiles

"I always wanted a big family with Stevie and she used to say how she wanted four kids." He smiles and chuckles lightly. 

"She wanted four girls..." Barbara shrugs.

"She did...sorry Greg...I guess you would've been daddy's little buddy huh....Well I mean, if you think about it, she does have four little girls." Lindsey sighs.

"Well, I can only give you five more minutes, you're out of surgery now...You're still in a Coma, but It's getting late and we still have one more stop." She states.

"I don't want to go to another stop, I want to stay here with my babies." Lindsey pouts.

"If you want, after each test, that I take you on, we can spend a little time here." Barbara tries to reason with him.

"Fine...let me cuddle with them longer." He states.

"They're all asleep. They must feel comfortable with daddy." Barbara beams.

"I kind of feel bad for the other three." He points to the other three babies playing with various toys in the playpen.

"Don't feel bad. I know Emma Kristen's coming. She'll play with them while these cuties sleep."