Let Me See (Let Me Series)

Chapter 15

"D-does this mean pumapayag ka na?" Gian softly asked. His voice was a little bit shaky but I could sense a hint of uncertainty in it. Para bang hindi siya makapaniwala sa sinabi ko. Well, I couldn't believe it myself as well. Wala naman talaga sa plano ko ang magpunta rito but the people in this foundation changed my views in life in just a snap. Who am I to turn them down kung ito na pala ang paraan para makabangon din ako sa pagkakalugmok ko sa buhay, 'di ba?

Tumango ako bilang sagot sa kanya. Unexpectedly, Gian pulled me in for a hug. The hug was tight yet comforting at the same time. Unsure of what I should do, I just played with my hands which were on top of my lap. When Mrs. Jarajo cleared her throat, doon lang humiwalay sa akin si Gian.

"Sorry po," nahihiyang sabi ni Gian. Bahagya namang natawa si Mrs. Jarajo dahil doon. After a while, she confirmed with me kung tutuloy na ba talaga ako sa pagsali sa foundation. When I said yes, inasikaso na rin niya agad ang mga papeles para roon.

Since I'm visually impaired and I couldn't really see whatever's written on the documents that I needed to sign, pinauwi na lang sa amin yung papers para ma-check daw muna nina mommy yung nandoon. If after that we have decided that's everything's okay, saka na lang daw namin ibalik sa kanya. She also scheduled my first session with Mrs. Laliana. Introductions lang naman daw ang gagawin doon para ma-assess din daw yung mga kailangan ko.

"W-would it be possible for me to go back to my regular routine as well?" I can't help but ask. I badly want to go back to school and finish my degree. Kaunti na lang naman kasi and I will be graduating na rin. I know I missed a lot of lessons already but I still wanted to give it a try.

"If you would ask me, I'm suggesting to take things slow. It would be difficult to fully adjust to your surroundings. Kahit na nandiyan si Gian to help you out, iba pa rin ang magiging takbo ng buhay mo. Pakiramdaman mo muna ang mga bagay bagay and once you've gripped how things work with your current situation, then you'll be able to do more activities than usual," pagpapaliwanag ni Mrs. Jarajo sa akin. She even told me how Jillian coped up when she was just starting here. Nahirapan din daw mag-adjust si Jillian but through the help of the foundation and Gian, she managed to win her battles.

Would I be able to win too now that Gian's here beside me? I can't help but wonder.

Bago kami umalis ni Gian, we waited for Jillian. Malapit na rin naman daw matapos yung session ng ina-assist niya ngayon so Gian decided to wait for her.

"Gian, can I ask you something?" pambabasag ko sa katahimikang bumabalot sa aming dalawa.

"Ano 'yon?" tipid niyang sagot sa akin. Hindi talaga ako sure kung dapat ko ba 'tong itanong sa kanya o kung magbibigay ba siya ng matinong sagot sa akin kaso hindi talaga kasi ako matahimik. I needed to get this off my chest at baka mabaliw lang ako sa kaiisip kapag hindi talaga nasagot yung mga tanong na tumatakbo sa utak ko.

I then took a deep breath and sighed heavily. Naramdaman ko ang biglang paglipat ng atensyon sa akin. It feels like someone was watching me intently and I don't even have to think kung sino ba ang gumagawa noon ngayon. Kaming dalawa lang naman ni Gian ang nandito sa mini garden ngayon. I couldn't hear anyone else aside from the two of us.

"Why are you so invested in me and my situation? I get the point that you might be seeing the same situation that your sister had before but you didn't have to be this invested and this involved. Kahit kasi pagbali-baligtarin ko ang sitwasyon, hindi ko maintindihan. I know this isn't about money, so why?" tanong ko kay Gian and now, it was his turn to sigh. Para bang hindi niya inaasahan ang naging tanong ko.

After a few moments of silence, Gian then held my hand lightly. He was holding it like it was a very fragile item that could break with a wrong move. His hand was shaking but he was trying his best to calm it down. Lalo lang tuloy akong naguluhan sa sitwasyon.