MANAL

46: Manal

After so many deliberations, I decided to keep my pride aside and send Jawaad a text message. I could no longer stay calm. The silence was eating me up.

Assalamualaikum!

I clicked on the send button and sat up, clutching the phone to my chest. "I pray he replies." I muttered underneath my breath. I didn't know how I would feel if he didn't, for it took a lot of courage for me to send him that single message. For the past week, I had been the one starting conversations with him. In as much as I didn't want to admit it to myself, I knew I was doing the most...I knew I might be a disturbance to him. I just hoped not.

I waited and waited. Ten minutes passed and he still hadn't responded. I got up from my bed and began to pace to and fro. For some inexplicable reason, I wasn't angry or disappointed. I was worried—worried that something terrible might had happened to him. My heartbeat accelerated, so did my breath. I had to take a seat on my bed in order to calm my nerves.

"What's going on, Amiga?" Hala looked down at me from the top of her bed.

I exhaled. "It's nothing."

"Are you sure?" By the tone of her voice, I could denote she wasn't convinced.

"Yeah." I forced a smile. I was so worried about Jawaad and needed someone to talk to, but at the same time, I knew Hala was the wrong person for that. I was even surprised she hadn't asked me about him yet. It seemed she had already moved on.

"Okay." She hummed. "Sister Hauwa is coming back tomorrow, are you aware?"

"Nope." I shook my head. "Did she tell you that?"

"Yeah. I called her earlier and she informed me."

"Oh!" I remarked. "That's cool. It's about time she returned."

"I know right. So much has been going on. She must have missed a lot."

"Yeah." I agreed, totally uninterested in the conversation we were having. I had a problem to worry about.

"I saw Farida earlier."

"Didn't you say you were trying to get some sleep?" I tactically changed the topic. Discussing about Farida would indubitably elongate to her brother. I wasn't ready for us to have the conversation at the moment. It just didn't feel right.

"Not forthcoming." She heaved a sigh. "I'm so tired, but weirdly, I cannot bring myself to sleep. Let's take a stroll." She suggested.

"No." I declined. "I'd much rather stay here and read. Have you forgotten we have a test tomorrow?"

Hala rolled her eyes. "The lecturer obviously said that so that we'd go through the handout. I'm a hundred percent sure she's not going to give any test, so just relax."

"Even so."

"Your call." She pursed up her lips. "I'm going to sleep." She said and turned to the other side of the bed.

When I checked my phone and realize Jawaad still hadn't responded, the rate at which I was worried, tremendously escalated. "Should I speak to Farida?" I shook my head. "Bad idea. What should I do then? Call him?" Left with no other choice, I decided to do it.

I was skeptical—extremely, but the amount of worry surmounted the skepticism.

I brought the phone to my ear and stilled when familiar sound of his voice filled my ear. "Assalamu alaikum." His voice was husky, yet soft at the same time. It sent butterflies erupting in my stomach.

"Hello?"

I opened my mouth to respond, but I couldn't bring myself to do. I was tongue-tied.

"Are you there?" He asked.