What the heart wants

Chapter 38

Jeongyeon's not sure if she should stay at the dorm. She puts her jacket on and walks to the door ready to head out.

"Where are you going?" Chaeyoung's voice halts her.

She wants to say she's going to a cafe or something but she's afraid the younger girl would see through her lies. She settles for a little truth instead, "Just need some fresh air to clear my mind."

Chaeyoung tilts her head and her forehead creases with confusion. Lately it feels like the taller girl has been going out of her way to put some distance between them and it bothers her more than it should.

"Why is it that I feel like the people I care about are always running away from me?"

Jeongyeon opens her mouth to say something but Chaeyoung cuts her off. "Don't answer that. I guess I'm just not worthy of anyone's love."

The hopelessness and utter despair in her voice is what changes Jeongyeon's mind. She shrugs off her jacket and slumps on the couch next to Chaeyoung.

"Want to get drunk?" She asks, trying to lighten the mood.

They watch a film in companionable silence for a while sipping on their vodka cocktails.

Jeongyeon often glimpses to her side and watches Chaeyoung who's engrossed in the movie. Her face lighting up during lighter moments, her eyes twinkling as she laughs and her lips curving into an adorable pout when things go sour.

"You know it's not true what you said about not being worthy of love." Jeongyeon mutters under her breath, the alcohol in her system giving the courage to blurt out what's on her mind. "Anyone would be lucky to have you."

Chaeyoung turns to her side at the random declaration and their eyes for a strange reason lock on to each other like magnets. "Do you really think that?"

Jeongyeon nods as she strokes the younger girl's cheek with her thumb delicately.

"Look at you." Jeongyeon breathes. Her mind is yelling at her to stop, but she has no control over her heart because Chaeyoung is moving in closer for some reason and her willpower is dying fast and hard. "You have your own sense of style, you're smart and you know what you want."

Chaeyoung swallows thickly as her eyes search into the older girl's gaze. "What if I am not sure about what I want?"

"What do you want?"

Chaeyoung licks her suddenly dry lips, her heart begins to pound slowly in her chest. She's not sure if it's the vodka or the whispered words that's spinning her world. "I don't know anymore."

Jeongyeon's thumbs moves to caress the corner of her mouth making Chaeyoung's breath hitch.

"Only one way to know."

Chaeyoung is not sure who leans in first. She's not sure who closes the gap between them.
One thing she's sure that this is not love, it's a moment of weakness to feel loved that she cant resist. She can't fight against the older girl's smell that's flooding her senses now.

Their lips brush against each other, hot, fiery, passionate and demanding. She wants to pull away because this is wrong. She likes Mina and Jeongyeon loves Nayeon. She needs to stop before she loses herself but she can't seem to.

"Chaeyoungah." The taller girl whispers into her mouth slowly, prolonging each letter as if to savor them.

Chaeyoung's heart flutters at her voice as she clasps her hands on either side of her face. Her name sounds wonderful rolled out like that and starts a slow burning heat deep inside her stomach.

They pull apart and take shaky, shallow breaths.

"You're so beautiful." Jeongyeon whispers against her lips and it knocks all the wind from the younger girl's lungs.

She presses her tongue to the seam of the older girl's lips and delves inside her mouth. Her arms reach up and tangles around her strong neck. She arches into her chest moaning at the contact of body heat against her own. She feels the faint taste of vodka and peppermint Jeongyeon always chews on with every push of her tongue against hers.

She lies on her back and lets Jeongyeon's hand venture over her body, inquisitive and exploring. Chaeyoung lets out a whimper when the older girl kisses her way down to a particularly sensitive spot on her neck.

Jeongyeon works her way back to the tender, smooth and inviting lips. Chaeyoung inhales sharply as the older girl begins to nuzzle her neck again with delicate kisses. She urges herself to push away, but can't.

She knows she's reached the point of no return.

Clothes get removed, moans get mingled and their naked bodies move softly together, like the finest of silk.

A hand travels towards her center, their tongues entwined in a kiss, and then Jeongyeon's inside, changing her breathing with every thrust, sending her a little over the edge with every push, spinning her world on its axis.