reddie oneshots || fluff

7

WARNING: mentions of suicide

3rd person POV

Idiot. Annoying. Useless. Mistake.

The words echo around and around in Richie's head as he rocks back and forth in the corner of his bedroom he has taken refuge in. Silent tears stream down his red cheeks and drip to the floor, seeming deafening in the bitter silence of the night.

Why am I here? Why was I born? Is there any point in me living at all?

The depressing thoughts seem to gather above Richie's head in an unescapable cloud of anxiety. He doesn't even know what brought it on.

Lie.

He tells himself he doesn't know, but he does. It's his parents. It's always his parents. Richie is honestly amazed he's not in an orphanage by now, he must be reminded one-hundred times a day that he's not wanted.

Idiot. Annoying. Useless. Mistake.

Richie brings a pair of shaking hands up to his head and continues to rock back and forth, back and forth. His breathing becomes erratic and he feels as though he's drowning. Drowning in his own mind.

Blindly, Richie stumbles to his window and jumps out, landing three meters down with a thud. Somehow he finds himself on his bike, and begins to peddle. Richie doesn't know where he's going. He doesn't care. Escape. He has to escape.

Idiot. Annoying. Useless. Mistake.
Idiot. Annoying. Useless. Mistake.
Idiot. Annoying. Useless. Mistake.

Richie doesn't remember turning left onto the thin path that winds up through the forest, he doesn't remember abandoning his bike and running for a good thirty minutes, he doesn't remember collapsing on the top of the hill and just sitting there, screaming. Crying. Sobbing.

Idiot. Annoying. Use-

"Richie?" a voice penetrates the cloud, like a strip of lightning striking Richie's brain.
"Oh my god, Richie,"

Eddie.

The only thought that seemed certain in this mess of panic.

Slowly, slowly, Richie brings his hands down from where they grasp his hair and uncurls from the tight ball he'd turned himself into.

Eddie kneels in front of him, his face plastered with concern. He tentatively reaches out and grasps the taller boy's cold hands.

Eddie cares. No one else does, but Eddie cares.

"E- Eds?" Richie stutters. It's amazing really. The affect Richie's crush has on him. His hands have stopped shaking now that Eddie is holding them, and he can feel his breathing evening out.

"Hey, hey, it's ok. I'm here. It's ok." Eddie soothes. He has no idea what's made Richie so upset, but he knows it isn't good. Eddie had left his house an hour ago in an attempt to distance himself and his hypochondriac mother, and had stumbled upon Richie Tozier, having what seemed like a panic attack.

Not knowing what else to do, Eddie gathered Richie up in his arms and rubbed his back comfortingly, to simply remind Richie that he's there. He cares. And he would stay here all night if he had to.

"What... happened?" Eddie whispers, still hugging Richie.
"My... my p-parents," Richie splutters. He knows he'll most likely regret this in the morning, he shouldn't be telling Eddie this. His problems don't matter. He doesn't matter. But for now he just needs to get it out, to tell someone.

"They- they- they hate me. They say i'm a
m-mistake and that I don't deserve to be loved. And I don't. No body loves me. I'm just the
T-T-T-Trashmouth. Annoying, asshole Richie Tozier who can't do a thing right. I don't know why i'm even here anymore. I could run away. I could just end it all. No one would care. No one would look for me. My parents would probably be happy. I shouldn't even be telling you this. Why would you care? No body cares. No body cares."

It's to much. To have it all out in the open. Richie's eyes dart back down to the floor and he hugs his knees to his chest. He can feel the sickening dread settle back down in his stomach, and he knows he's going to lose control again. The clouds are gathering. The anxiety is overwhelming.

Why did you tell him? Oh my god Richie, why the fuck did you tell him? Now he's just going to think you're even more of a weirdo. Now-

Richie gasps as a pair of soft lips press to his. Electricity courses through him and the seemingly life-threatening anxiety is washed away, replaced by the tingling of butterflies soaring in his stomach.

Eddie smiles slightly as Richie kisses back, and brings his hand forwards to cup Eddie's face. To Eddie, everything seems perfect in that moment. The heart wrenching feeling of knowing the boy you love thinks he is worthless seems like a distant memory, replaced by the excitement of having your first kiss.

He likes me back.

All to soon the boys have to pull away for air, but only by a centimetre. Eddie looks directly into Richie's stunned hazel eyes, and whispers
"I love you, Richie,"

"I love you, and I always will."

_____________

my original idea for this update was supposed to be them watching the sunset together, and then halfway through i just gave up. kinda a sad one i guess but it took me three days cause i'm an unmotivated dumbass and yeah lmao

also tysm for 200 views!! i never thought people would actually read my shit- your comments literally make my day. aight well ima go binge read reddie fanfics cause it's friday so i don't have to get up for school at 7:30am 😌