Chasing a New Sunrise

Chapter 18

Ehtan is coming over in a few so that we can paint Mrs. Hendrix's apartment. I feel like I've gotten myself into a giant pickle with those two. I don't know why I'm setting myself up for this disaster. I didn't think I was that desperate for companionship, but I guess after being ignored for several months and being dumped the night my father died has something to do with it.

Looking through my old Facebook again is not helping anything. I'm rereading old comments and it's crazy how much a difference twenty four hours makes. January eighth I have comments about what an amazing girlfriend I am, and comments on pictures from the weekend before about how much fun it was, and then several hours later an outpouring of condolences, followed by being blamed for Lawrence's mothers death.

Mom gently knocks on the door of my room and peaks her head around.

"Ethan's here," she says.

"Oh, great."

I close down my laptop trying to shake it all off, knowing I need to delete all of it but still haven't. I find a spot for the computer and then grab my things. I wasn't sure what to wear to paint, but decided on an old worn out pair of yoga pants and an old Tulsa t-shirt that I could care less about what happens to it.

Mom stops me before I leave the room, "you two getting serious?" she asks just above a whisper.

"Ma, Ethan and I are just friends," I say.

"Does he know that?" she questions.

I sigh and look up at her. Moms lips are pulled into a tight line and lowers her brows. My eyes sting with the threat of tears, I'm not that horrible am I? I nod, and mom places her hands on my shoulders.

"Honey, I'm not saying..."

"No, mom I get it. I should go," I say.

"If you need to talk..."

"I'm fine mom."

I pull away and try not to look back, I can feel her watching after me as I leave the room. By the time I get to the living room I wipe my face of any trace of the conversation I just had with mom. Ethan's smile makes it easy for me to forget, and even as mom says her goodbyes from behind us I'm still able to keep my composure.

Mrs. Hendrix had everything all set out for us when we got to her apartment, including cookies and some lemonade. We have been painting for an hour now and it actually doesn't look half bad, my part at least. Ethan's side looks as if a professional came in here and painted. I have never in my life painted anything other than paper, so this was a bit nerve wracking. I was shocked that she actually trusted me to come along with him.

Ethan and I take a small break to enjoy some cookies. Mrs. Hendrix is in the kitchen banging around pots and pans and making a huge racket.

"What did you think of the game?" he asks.

"It was cool. I'm not much of a football fan so I honestly had no idea what was going on," I say. Ethan chuckles.

He gets up from his spot on the folding chair, leans over takes another bite and then grabs his roller to continue painting. I watch as his tight white tee-shirt lifts just enough to get a view of his abs. For a lean guy Ethan has some nice muscles under there. His arm muscles twitch with every move too. I know I shouldn't be looking, and just the thought of it sends heat up my cheeks.

"Slacker," he says, turning to me.

I glance up at his face and he's smiling from ear to ear, like he has no idea my mind is in the gutter, or maybe he does. I have to stop thinking like this, it's these kinds of thoughts that's going to have me winding up with no friends.