fifty-five

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harper

that was it.

the best sex of my life, or i'll probably ever have.

because it meant something.

i've learned that everything with ethan means something.

i flutter my eyes open from the morning sun, and feel a warm body against mine. ethan lays his head in the crook of my neck, and i hear small little snores escape his lips.

ethan and i never cuddled after we would do it.
it was always more of a lay there and talk until one of us would fall asleep on their respectable side of the bed type of thing.

i love him next to me. i love everything that is ethan.

one of his arms is lazily slung over me, trapping me down to the soft sheets. but i don't mind. i think i'll stay here for awhile.

my mind goes back to the time ethan stayed over one night and cooked eggs the next morning. i smile at the memory and gaze at his long, thick eyelashes and soft lips.

"ethan," i whisper.

he licks his lips, letting out a grumble of words that i can't make out.

"ethan."

nothing.

"ethan."

"ethan—"

"harper. harper. harper," he mocks my tone and with a higher pitched voice than normal, clearly annoyed. his eyes are still closed and half of his face is buried in the pillow.

"ethan."

this time, he half smiles and his eyes open lazily.
"god, you're so annoying."

"but guess what."

"what?"

"you love me."

he rolls his eyes playfully, hugging me closer. "didn't you say that i could be mad at you today? thought we had an agreement."

i attempt a shrug. "you can be, but what's the fun in that?"

"true. i'll have to think about it. get back to me in twenty minutes."

he falls back asleep, and i use it as my time to slip from under his grasp. he grabs a pillow in replacement of me, which makes me smile.

i've laid out my clothes for the day and gotten my shower ready, so i step into the hot steam and immediately sigh.

even though i'm still expecting ethan's disappointment today, at least i know he loves me.

he loves me.

the thought makes me smile as i tilt my head back in the water, closing my eyes and prepping to wash my hair.

two hands rest on either side of my waist, pushing me to the side gently to make room in the shower.

it doesn't surprise me— almost as if i was expecting it.

the hands then gently falter down, grazing more of my skin before falling down completely.

my smile grows wider as i turn around and see ethan staring back at me. he looks tired, which makes me wonder if he dragged himself out of bed just for this.

"can i come in?" he asks, raising an eyebrow.

it seems playful, but genuine at the same time. like if i were to actually ask him to get out, he would without question.

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