Edward Cullen: Purse Snatcher

Surrender

Emmett

I flipped Jasper the finger as he passed me up for the second time on the way to the campgrounds. Whenever Edward, Jasper and I got together, there always something that we turned into a competition. Whether it was racing, swimming or even belching, we competed until we found a winner. It was fucking tradition. Our camping trip would be no different.

And I couldn't wait to get Bella and Edward back for all the crap I had to go through in that tiny nine-by-nine cell and gutting fish. Not to mention the funky smell that had me dipping my ass in a lemon-douche water concoction. How the fuck was I supposed to know not to dip in it completely naked, especially if you had an open wound. Fucking manscaping; that shit stung.

Oh yeah, it was high time the happy couple got what was coming to them.

Edward

Once Emmett and Jake were in my review mirror, I knew I was safe until the next chance for him to pass came up. I looked over at Bella and smiled. "You know Emmett's going to try something, right?"

She laughed and shrugged. "That's fine with me. I can take him."

I took her hand in mine and pulled it to my lips. "Oh, you've proved that this morning, love. Are you willing to show me a few moves?"

Bella bit her lip, cocking her head to one side as she regarded me. "I don't know, Edward." She shrugged and smiled coyly. "What's in it for me?"

"Peace of mind," I said easily. "And if a mugger chooses to hold us up, I don't have to look like ass and let my wife take care of it." I was baiting her, because I knew that shit wouldn't be taken lightly. She was a feminist at heart, at least about certain things.

She cocked in eyebrow in question. "Are you saying you wouldn't protect me anyway?" Her bottom lip trembled as moisture started to gather at the corners of her eyes.

Holy shit! Had I really made it sound that way? Then the brat started to laugh. "Oh, you better not turn on the water works like that again." I growled playfully. "I said it jokingly. Baby, I'd take a bullet for you, even a bazooka shell."

She sighed. "Clearly, my father decided to show you his collection. He had emailed me a picture of the modified shell, painted with your likeness on side with a target on your chest."

I shuddered. "Your father has way too much time on his hands."

She giggled and agreed. We talked about Charlie and Heidi's upcoming nuptials. I asked a question without thought. Just blurted it out like a dumbass. "Is Heidi okay with not having children?"

Bella rolled her eyes. "Edward, my father is only forty-two years old. And as Heidi all ready mentioned the nauseating information to me, he's very capable of having children." I groaned, sickened with the mental image of Charlie testing his spunk to make sure his soldiers were still in prime condition.

"What's strange is the idea that Heidi and I might get pregnant at the same time."

I cringed and shuddered again. "Um, yeah, that is really weird." A thought crossed my mind, there were still things I didn't know about Bella. They were the type of things that would affect our future together. "How many kids would you like to have?"

"I'd like to have one of each, at the very least, but three seems to be the right number to me."

I smiled and kissed her hand again. "That does sound perfect. I hope she has your eyes." Already picturing our future daughter, I was awed by the dreamlike image of the pint-sized beauty.

Bella gave me a brilliant smile. "I hope our little boy has your –" she looked thoughtful, and I knew then she was baiting me. Fuck, I loved that she would do that with me every day for the rest of our lives. "Teeth."