Loved in Shades (A Jaylor Fanfiction)

Juniper

The monsters turned out to be just trees
Two Months Later; Present Time
Taylor Swift's Point of View
18 weeks, 6 days. I'm almost 19 weeks pregnant and about half way through my pregnancy. Hopefully half way. The average pregnancy is 39 weeks and I'm really not wanting to cut that short.
Something interesting has been happening lately. I've been feeling an emotion I haven't in months. Every once in a while I'll begin to feel happy. The feeling that my entire body is engulfed by darkness, it's beginning to fade. I have been drowning for so long, it almost became normal to feel like complete shit all the time. Now that I'm happy sometimes, it feels like a new emotion...but it also scares me that I might loose my happiness. I've lost it once, I don't want to do it again.
I look at the time which is 1:32 pm on the dot. He's late. Why is he late? He's never been late. I get out my phone and open Joe's contact. Right as I'm about to call him I hear the doorbell ring which causes me to sigh out of relief. I go to the door and open it.

"What took you so long?!" I snap.

"Taylor, I'm a whole 3 minutes late." Joe says looking at his watch.

"You said you would be on time!"

"It's three minutes...chill."

"I can't chill! I thought you were dead or something! I mean, after all we have been through I can imagine you might understand how scared I might feel when someone is late. I mean, what if-." I ramble on.

Joe stops me mid sentence. "Taylor, it's okay. I'm here and alive. If it makes you feel better, I'll be early next time."

"Okay good. Thank you."

"What a minute...you were freaking out that I was late. Awwww someone still actually cares about me." Joe smiles and puts his hand on the left side of his chest.

"Shut up, of course I care about you. You're the father to our children. I mean, I get mad at you a lot but I still care."

"Aww you're so cute."

"Shut up." I say with a small smile.

Joe laughs and sits down on the couch. I follow him and sit next to him.

"So, your next doctor appointment is in a week. Do you wanna find out the gender?" He asks.

"I think we should wait until he or she is possibly born. I don't want to go and find out because I feel like it will get my hopes up."

"You know, there's no harm in getting your hopes up. You're past for first trimester so there's better chances now."

"I was hopeful last time. I was super excited and when it didn't work out, I was broken. I don't want to think it'll work because if it doesn't, maybe it'll hurt less." I explain.

"Okay, I understand. Well, have you been coming up with any ideas for names?"

"I haven't even told my parents I'm pregnant again. I haven't put much thought into it."

"I feel like you should tell them. I mean, you're almost half way."

"I know but they'll get so excited and I don't want to deal with it. Can't I just wait until I give birth or miscarry." I whine.