Saving Grace (Narry)

Thirteen

Thirteen 

Plenty of time has passed since we first met Grace and, even though I felt myself missing her, I knew that the days in between were just really the days that just brought us closer to being with her again.

I stayed up during the night really thinking about how much Grace didn't about what was going on around her. Did she know she had a birth defect in her heart? Did she know why she was meeting us? Was she ever afraid? Once she was placed into our arms, would she cry in distress and reach out for her father's comfort? Would she know that Louis wasn't giving her up but giving her the chance at a normal life like we all wanted for her? 

All I could conclude was that she was so lucky at this age. Grace wasn't old enough to have, and remember, all these worrying thoughts to keep her awake all night.

Niall noticed. He usually fell asleep with his back turned to me. When he'd get into bed now, he'd stay up facing me, his head resting in his hand with his elbow propped up for its support. Niall stayed up al night with me and would ask what I was feeling or what I was thinking about. 

I told Niall. Ever since he let me hold him in my arms, I felt like he needed so much more from me than I have been giving him lately. So, that's what I've started to give back to him again: all of my thoughts and  my feelings. In return, I continued to get all of Niall.

We hadn't stayed up throughout the entire night and just talked about everything and anything since we first started dating; before either of us had grown-up jobs and responsibilities. I just wanted to learn about the amazing person who saw something in me. I realised how much I missed that and that I should have never forgotten a single thing about that amazing person.

Niall helped me sort my mind out, even though I knew he thought I sounded like a madman. He used to be my voice of reason until I was in too deep that my own voice blacked his out. I wanted to start to hear him again and not just my own but, I didn't need to hear him telling me not to worry anymore, especially since I knew Niall had all of his own worries. 

 I asked him what his were in return. I asked him how he felt.

He was still scared so I reached over, in the dark, and took his hand, holding it rather tightly. Niall told me he missed me. His voice had been quiet but it was loud enough for me to hear, loud enough for me to be able to hear that strain in his voice. I believed his words. 

I told him that I was there and I wasn't going to leave him again.

Then he added, "even with a child in the picture?"

I put too much pressure on him at the start of this entire process, making it seem like it was all about me and the baby. I was too into my own head with what I wanted. I confessed that to Niall. I also told him, "the only reason I'll eve want or have a family is because the man that I love wanted one with me of all people."

Niall chuckled his throaty laugh at that and lifted our joined hands to kiss my knuckles. Then he kissed me, really leaning his body into mine and held my face still as he moved his lips over my own. That night was also the first time we've had sex in quite a while.

We now had one last small meet up with Louis and Zayn. Louis pretty much wanted to get certain things finalised, involving liabilities and him giving us his most direct contact information and wanting to know which doctor we've chosen, which Zayn already knew about. I still had to call the doctor. I was usually really on top of things but I just couldn't pick up the phone because we didn't have Grace and her medical file on hand yet. We had received that during the meeting. 

Niall and I, without a single doubt, would involve Louis with everything that was going to go on with his daughter. We weren't going to leave him stuck worrying about her and not have him not hear anything until after her surgery. Louis was still, and would always be, Grace's father, so he'd probably still worry about her everyday regardless of us.