Totally Normal (A Hobbit story)

Stressed, Depressed, And Lemon Zest!

A/N) Okay, before we begin, I have to ask; did you ever read that book, A Bad Case Of The Stripes? I didn't remember it until I saw the cover two weeks ago, then I just had this wave of nostalgia. By the way, Lima beans are both DELICIOUS and NUTRITIOUS! Anyways, I found a YouTube vid of someone reading the book aloud, and you know who the reader was? None other than Samwise Gamgee himself. Small world.

~

Everyone perked up at her sudden emergence behind Bilbo, but Beorn was the first to stand.

"Tanya," he started, about to chastise her to go back to the room.

"I'd like to say something." She raised a hand to silence him. She stalked past Bilbo, sparing him no side glance.

"You're not going to leave me here." She shook her head. "You're going to take me with you as agreed, we're going to usurp the dragon from the mountain, and we will defeat any who try to stop us.

I was brought on because of what I can do, so hearing you discuss how dire it is to keep me is an insult to me and everything I am.

In addition, you will forget the last half-month as I wish to never speak of it again. The pain is fresh, and just having to think about it is torture enough, so I would appreciate it if you would all stop tiptoeing around me and treat me like normal. These terms are mine, and they are non-negotiable." She spoke in a firm, borderline demanding voice.

A thought swept through the company, but was left unsaid; but something about Tanya had changed.

Of course, Tanya had always been stubborn and tough, but there had always been a sense of playfulness before, that she just didn't have now.

Even when she would have arguments or scuffles before, she always seemed to brush it off, like she didn't care. They saw it in every game she played, every story she told.

But now, even only in the words she spoke, she was cold, calculating and exact. Her yellow eyes were drawn impassive, like there was a darkness behind them waiting to storm.

She still definitely seemed like she didn't care, but this new display was something different entirely.

No one said anything for the longest time; just stared in stunned silence.

Finally Gandalf leaned forward with narrowed eyes and a mouth slightly agape.

"You heard the lady." He broke the silence, keeping his eyes glued to her. "She stays with us."

~

An hour later, everyone was still wary, especially around Tanya. She had gone outside to get away from everyone since she had so ceremoniously exited after winning their debate.

Beorn had followed her out, and they had been talking ever since. They needed to know what had become of the other after so long.

No one dared interrupt or intrude on the two of them, which Bilbo understood, as uncomfortable as it was to stand around, trapped inside the house.

Eventually though, the both of them came in, and Tanya went straight to the table to nurse a whole bottle of some drink she found in a cabinet.

"This honey is expired!" She complained, waving the bottle out.

Bilbo sat next to her and took a sniff of the neck of the bottle. "Sweetie that's mead." He told her. Fermented honey alcohol.

Tanya simply rolled her shoulders back. "I don't understand that word and therefore it is meaningless." She said.

"Sweetie?" Beorn raised an eyebrow from across the table, and suddenly Bilbo wanted to shrink away.

Is he going to want to kill me? Should I tread lightly or would he respect confidence and I should just confirm it?