"When you think you have it all but in the end, everything he did was like a game for him".
Trying to find love as an artist; despite all the tiring activities and rehearsals, both of them want each other but is difficult to say.
*Mature rating on s...
The day after yesterday was pretty intense and such an upsetting day for Jimin and me. But yesterday, everything was a huge mess; even though we return to the bed just being ourselves, that day a lot of things changed completely. Hyonu is going way too far since those hashtags of me and Jimin started to trend through social media, which made our manager and CEO want to talk with us. They were strict and direct. They don't want us near one another and assured that everything is going to change from now on until everything settles down. Jimin will be changing rooms with Jungkook, so, he'll be with Jin-hyung and the maknae is going to be with me. Also, the only place we'll be able to act with affection against each other is during the concerts of the tour. If you ask me, it sucks.
Hyonu is getting what he wanted and because he knows that, he texted me earlier this day after the rehearsal we had at the venue of the concert. It seems he's willing to give me a second chance to change my mind about Jimin but I'm not going to let him win so easily. Yet, I have to admit that it's starting to get to me. The only way I can calm down is by taking pictures of both when we hang out with the rest of the members; during the practice hours, when we stay alone at the hotel and decide to change up the routine, and little moments we can share. All of these sounds so wrong when he's my boyfriend.
Since I'm struggling, I decided to take advice from Namjoon-hyung. He knows about the hate I'm going through, because Jungkook was the one to tell him about the basic things he needed to know about the current situation, there's the reason why he told me to trust Namjoon. As I'm currently by his side inside one of the rooms from the venue, I can see how much he worries about me and the situation Jimin and I are going through.
-Tae, why haven't you told this to our manager? – Namjoon asked.
-Honestly, it might be because I don't want him to make us break up – I admitted.
-You could always get to an agreement – He told.
-It would be difficult and I don't want Jimin to suffer those consequences – I sighed.
-Well, so, in that case... what are you doing right now to solve this out? – Namjoon asked.
-It will sound pathetic but, we aren't near each other when the manager or even the staff is around – I disclosed.
-Both agreed on that? - He asked surprised.
I just nodded silently.
-Taehyung, you need to report this... Hyonu will make both suffer if you don't stop him now – Namjoon spoke before the door got opened.
Immediately, Jimin got inside and then closed the door behind him. Namjoon and I stood in silence as I was hoping he didn't hear anything that we talked about.
-Jiminie, what are you doing here? – Namjoon asked confused.
-I got tired and told Jungkook to keep on rehearsing with Yoongi – Jimin explained.
He got behind me and started to back hug me, Namjoon looked at me concerned as I couldn't even hold Jimin's hand.
-Think about what we talked about, Tae – Namjoon told. -There's no other way – He added.
-Yes, I will... thank you hyung – I smiled slightly.
Jimin started to hide his face against my back and he was being clingier than ever before. Namjoon looked at me pretty worried so I just nodded before he stood up, he patted Jimin's head and then left the room.
I'm looking down, unable to have any eye contact with him. I couldn't even hold his hand and tell him that everything is going to be alright.
He cuddled against my lap while closing his eyes, it was obvious how much it was hurting him to be this way with me. And to be honest, I'm just feeling the same. Jimin wasn't happy about this, and right now, I'm clueless on what should I do.
-I understand – He murmured. -I'll go – Jimin stood up mournfully before exiting the room.
I couldn't do anything... nothing is left to do, just confront him and let him know about Hyonu.
I brought my hands to my face, I closed my eyes and started to sob loudly. It hasn't been even a month by his side and this is already starting to be as I imagined before; a complete field full of struggles and agony.
-Jimin's POV-
I'm walking quickly towards a room I can be by myself, briefly, I saw Jungkook coming my way. He immediately held my shoulders and started to look at me concerned.
-What happened, hyung? – He asked confused.
-Nothing, there's so nothing left to do – I stuttered. -I don't want to see him... I can't – I cried before getting away from him.
-Hyung! – Jungkook shouted my name but I didn't stop my way out of there. I need to be with me; I have to think alone.
I entered one room from the venue, it seems like our fitting room. Since nobody was there, I locked the door and sat down on the couch. With my hands on my knees and my head down, I started to imagine what could happen after everything that is going on. Taehyung deserves to be happy and I'm concerned I won't be able to give him what he desires.
Right now, I'm going through a lot. The hashtags going on about us are taking over my mind and it hurts me to know that I can't do anything to help him out. Oddly, the comments are against him... nothing bad has been published about me, which is rarely seen in controversies of this kind. I'm upset that he can't share his struggles with me since he fears I'll get hurt; there's where I wish I could be stronger for him. Be someone he can rely on and that can protect him against all odds. So, I'm starting to doubt about myself and if I can be the person he needs me to be right now; I'm starting to get upset for things I shouldn't because I know Tae likes them, but I don't know if that'll be enough for us to be together.
-Jimin open the door! – I heard Yoongi shout.
-Go away! I want to be alone – I shouted back as I laid down on the couch, trying to find some comfort by myself.
-No, you need someone there with you! And I won't let Taehyung destroy you like this – He told upset.
I was speechless by his words, oddly confused by where his loyalty is at. And hurt by knowing he is against someone he shouldn't.
-Don't blame this on him – I cried. -You don't know what he's going through – I stated.
-No, I don't... but I know what you are going through – He told. -What about you, Jimin? You need to think about yourself too – Yoongi spoke upset.
-Leave – I said overly. -Just go – I murmured.
-Why? Everyone is worried about you and the only thing you can do is push us away... why? We want to help and be with you, Jimin. Not just me – Yoongi said sincerely before I heard how he started to walk away.
I breathed heavily before shutting my eyes closed. I started to sob while holding myself in a tight hug. I was trapped and I knew that this wasn't going to be the worst-case scenario for us.
The fights and struggles will come for us... this will have more than one misunderstanding and I feel that at one point both will hurt each other. But even if that said, I want to be with you and stand by your side. I want to go through this together; with you holding me tightly and never letting me go. Because I know I'll run away and will want to let go from you at one point, after all, I don't want you to suffer more hate from those who aren't aware that you didn't choose me... I chose you.
