One Shots ~ Newtmas

Severe Amnesia (Part Two)

There were two ways in which we thought this would go, bad or good or possibly even a third way, not to change at all. Depending on how Thomas reacted, we needed to consider rewriting our variables. Possibly creating a new set, which would require an excess amount of time and effort, but the old ones were supposed to be set in stone, unchangeable, but I guess stuff close to a disastrous miracle happens. Just a shame it had to happen to people who just wanted to help.

Or so we're told.

Hope and belief clouded everything we thought could and should be true, blocking what would be true from our minds, that's why the results shocked everyone, even Thomas. No one possibly could've predicted something this simple could become one of the most complex problems we've had to deal with. It was insane and certainly impossible.

—|—

Thomas' POV

Water seemed to surround me, pushing me down, hard, with force I didn't know any liquid could obtain, let alone use. Everything seemed to slowly become black and white as I lost everything, my actual self being locked behind padlock and key in a deep crevice of my mind, littered with dust and cobwebs, covered by a heavy blanket. Soon enough, that me would suffocate and his death would indicate me losing everything, every memory I've stored, every single achievement I've obtained. They hadn't truly left me, not until this moment, but it wasn't the shock memory that vanished all but one, it was the feat I'd run without a goal that caused the effortless loss.

No point in keeping memories I wouldn't need, but when that part died, his name stuck onto me, superglued itself to my most active sector of my memory, keeping itself known. All I needed was one last shock and every pattern I've established since the initial zap would be gone, I'd be free, set for a new beginning.

Of course, I am making no sense to anyone, my mind is a puzzle I have yet to figure out, but nothing could hold me back from my end goal. Creating the ultimate ally. One name always made clear it wanted to be a part of this, Newt, but I didn't know who this Newt was, nor what this Newt was like, a con of memory loss. If I even had memories of the so called Newt that is.

Doctors and needles prepared me for what I assumed to be the final zap, but then I overheard conversation that if this didn't work I'd get the zap treatment, so this would be something unhelpfully different. My luck ran thin when it came to anything and everything, always dipping below the ice to see what life'd be like down there, constantly getting itself stuck, with little to no redemption for days, weeks, months, even years on end. Sometimes, I considered a tally, for every time my luck decided to tumble, but there was no use if I wouldn't have space after a month or two.

All sorts caught my eye as I watched needles smoothly gliding into my veins, taking blood, inserting multicoloured liquids. Talk of variables went over my head as I started to feel dizzy and tired, closing my eyes briefly, but they wouldn't open again, no matter how much I tried, it wasn't happening. Eventually, my eyelids finally decided to give in to the fight and I woke up to no one around me, needles sticking out, surrounded by tape, chains holding me down, for what reason I don't know, I never caused danger.

Slowly and cautiously, I straightened myself out as much as possible, restraints keeping me from getting far enough for satisfaction, feeling to my fingers and toes was gone, in fact I could only feel my face, I wasn't moving at all, even though my mind convinced me I was. Quickly, the panic settled. Creeping up the side of my face, an eager itch wiggled it's tail, teasing me. If anything, I was helpless from the grasp of paralysis. Curse my life and everything in it, I remembered everything, every thing about this entire bloody planet, I knew the answers to everything, yet my body had decided to shut down on me.

This was when I noticed my lips wouldn't open, they couldn't make a sound, I was speechless, literally, I am a goner, it felt like I was a pair of eyes in a useless void, watching destruction settle and beauty wither.

—|—

We thought he was dead at first, but no. Instead, Thomas was just paralysed, hopefully it's not permanent and just something to do more with shock rather than anything else. All of our efforts went to waste, he couldn't speak, he couldn't move, nothing good came out of this, but it definitely was worse than bad, way worse than what we thought bad would mean.

Answers and secrets, memories, they could be rushing through Thomas' mind right now and we would have no way of knowing, they could be sprinting through his head, overwhelming him, but he had no way of getting it out; we don't know what to do.

Years of research. Down the drain.

Gone.

Forevermore. Wishing we could've saved that boy, we had a chance to, but we did something wrong, messed it all up, now that boy was as good as dead, but there was one hope, one possibility that this might all work out, one final hope. The absolute ultimate Plan B. That one name Thomas kept chanting, Newt. Our last resort was the boy that had taken a liking to Thomas and had visited him countless of times, making friends with him a hundred times over, Thomas never remembering who he was, but he remembered his name, always.

One last chance, the last straw you could say; we couldn't stuff it up, not this time.

a/n: so the next part is gonna be the final part and it's gonna have a whole lot of newtmas in it, hopefully this was good, i just want to say thank you so so so so so so much for voting and commenting and reading my one shots, even though sometimes they're absolute rubbish, it means a lot, honestly!!!

and yes i'm sorry if this chapter was very confusing, i got confused myself, but i don't really know how to explain what was happening so that was my best shot.