Indebted to the Dominant

Twenty-Two

Owen

I stared at myself in the mirror. A black suit and a dark blue tie were fitted on me and all I wanted to do was take them off. It was too constricting and I already had enough to worry about today. Mer knocked on the door and I focused my attention on her. She was trying not to cry as she had been for the last three days.

When Cale dropped me off on the fifteenth, I sat down with Mer and Lu and the promised pie and told them what happened and the nightmares I'd been having. Lu broke down crying and she quickly excused herself from the room. Lu had always been an emotional person, even if she didn't like showing it so I didn't blame her for leaving the room. Mer stared at the table for a long time and then she slammed the coffee mug onto the table, swearing she was going to kill Xander.

It took a few hours, but both had eventually calmed down and we had a somewhat civilized discussion. Mer, in agreement with Cale's idea, promised that as soon as all of this was over, she was going to find me a therapist and drag me there if she had too. I assured her she wasn't going to have to drag me and that I would willingly go.

It took the next three nights for everything to come back from the fourteenth. It was like every time I closed my eyes, Xander or Ben was there. It was a miracle I got any sleep at all. Whenever I had a nightmare, I called Cale. He'd talk me down and tell me a story until I fell asleep and then leave a long message on my phone. I always replied with a simple 'thank you.'

I had made up my mind about our situation. He was right. I needed a few days to think and I told him last night that I wasn't done forgiving him, but what he did seemed so small compared to what was going on that my anger had pretty much dissipated. Now I was just sad that he hadn't been upfront with me. Of course, his fears of me saying no to his idea of paying him back were rightfully placed, as I would have definitely said no.

But I also told him we could have worked something else out. Now, it was different and I would probably always be wary of him lying to me to get what he wants.

"Hey, sweetie. You ready to go?" she gave me a small, encouraging smile as I turned to show her how I looked.

"I hate this. You look so handsome, but it's for such a stupid reason. Mr. Jones keeps trying to assure me that everything will be okay and that we have nothing to worry about. I just think he knows how Lu and I will react and I'm okay with that." She fixed something with tie and then shook her head, "No, I'm not. I want to give the prosecution a piece of my mind and tell them to go shove something somewhere inappropriate,"

"Everything will work out. Cale thinks we have enough to show the judge that the prosecution has no reason, no logical reasoning for charging me and I believe in him,"

Lu walked in and handed Mer the box of tissues they'd been sharing and hugged me tightly. She straightened my outfit and then told me there was a taxi waiting for me just as Cale had promised. I hugged both of them and kissed them on the cheek.

The ride to the courthouse was spent staring out the window, chewing my fingernails in a small attempt to control my emotions so I didn't look stupid or weepy in front of the judge or anyone, really. The taxi driver kept glancing back at me before he turned down the music and said, "You okay, kid?"

I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Was I okay? Let me think. I've been sexually assaulted, had my heart ripped out of my chest, I've been arrested, I've been drugged, and now I'm going to trial where I have to face everyone in the same room and I was most definitely not prepared for that. Instead of telling the driver all that, I smiled slightly, "Yeah, just a little nervous,"

The driver nodded and turned back up the music. For the rest of the ride, the music was the only noise in the cab and it did nothing to shake the feeling of something bad about to happen.