The Grasshopper

Chapter 49

“During the following period of my life I focused on creating the minimal, cheapest possible State,” Mr. Kaella continued his life’s story. “Why should the Consumers and the Company Sectors have to pay high taxes in order to support some mastodon-like State.”

“There really isn’t any reason,” Babe agreed.

“Of course there isn’t. And do you know what else they criticized me for?”

“Is it possible that they criticized you for something more?” Babe was stunned.

“Of course. There are people whose malice knows no boundaries. They criticized me because my company doesn’t pay taxes.”

“Well, that’s something I really cannot believe, Mr. Kaella.”

“My company can certainly pay taxes, but it will be then immediately included in the prices of energy, water, food, treatment, apartments… How can the average Consumer pay for that? How can they survive?”

“Impossible.”

Babe turned towards Prince, opened her mouth, rolled her eyes, and sighed like it was very stuffy and she was struggling for air. She waved her hand in front of her face as though to cool herself, like she was too hot. She lowered her hand and reached the lapel of her leather jacket. She drew the jacket away from her, that is to say from her ample breasts, because she was obviously getting hot under the reflectors in the submarine salon.

“Yes, impossible,” Mr. Kaella confirmed yet again. “That is why I reduced the costs of the state. I abolished these two parliament houses that had existed previously…”

“What was all that about?” Babe was wondered.

Prince leaned his hands on the edge of the coffee table. That was the only thing preventing him from jumping Babe before the million-strong audience. Having seen his reaction, Babe used her other hand to unfasten the button above her bellybutton, concealed from the old Mr. Kaella by the couch armrest, and she opened wide her lapel.

“That was nonsense. You hadn’t even been born back then. You know, back then there were like some elected representatives who sat in some seats, talked, quarreled. Like, they would pass laws… and for that they received huge salaries, which the average person could only dream of. Then they formed some sort of government, then the prime minister, and the ministers, and all kinds of agencies, assistants… assistant’s assistants, secretaries, assistant secretaries… And then elections every four years. You can imagine how much it cost! I abolished all that nonsense and significantly reduced the costs of the state. I left the President of the State, who has a minimal administration. And the president is elected every ten years, as you know.”

“Of course.”

Prince stared sideways at the huge breast, scratching with his nails at the surface of the table and barely breathing. Perhaps Babe was only pretending to be hot and that she was running out of air, but Prince was truly gasping for air.

“How big is it? It’s even bigger when it’s bare… Bigger than in my wildest dreams… with two hands… I’ll knead it, squeeze it, slap it…”

“I merged the former military and former police into a single organization, i.e. the Inspectorate. This also cut costs. I stopped weapons production. I mean, we produce a minimum, for the Inspectorate. There are no more wars… I mean…” Mr. Kaella remembered that he would soon be declaring a new war.

“It doesn’t matter,” he thought. “It’s going to be short. I have to explain my ideas, my principles, to the people.”

“How can I permit wars, Miss Babe?”

“You can’t, of course.”

From her protruding nipple dangled another chain with a small Earth.

“You’ll pay for this… you‘ll pay, when I tug at that Earth. You’ll squeal…”

“I can’t. What does a person spend in war? A bullet. Or an entire group of people spends only one projectile. And then what? We lose Consumers.”

“Terrible.”

Prince  managed to raise his eyes to Babe’s face, wanting to appear menacing, to let her know that he would ravage her, seriously punish her for what she was doing to him. And Babe, running the tip of her tongue across the edge of her teeth, studded with silver stars, licking the ends of the upper lips, clearly showed her Prince how intimidated she was.

“Not to go into all these details – I reduced the costs of the state to one third,” Mr. Kaella summarized at the end of his exposé.

“To one third?”

“Yes.”

“Do you hear this, dear viewers? Do you understand what Mr. Kaella has done for us?”