give it to you (momoland oneshots)

the magnum opus in fall

wherein daisy saw photos of her in a photo exhibit.

— jeniji —

***

'this is a big problem.'

i thought as i massaged my forehead. i squinted at the sky, trying to beg for it to finally point me to my elusive magnum opus.

i have a photo exhibit coming, and i still don't have my main masterpiece. i can't let anyone down in this exhibit—since this one's a special one.

why is it so evasive this time? my subjects before weren't as complicated.

i'm at this park, the crusty, orange ombre of the leaves look almost as crestfallen as me—i can't believe the fall season is really on its peak at the lowest point of my life. i grunted and stopped myself from wailing.

seriously.

i don't really think of my subjects for photos on days end. i never did in my whole career. they were simple and very easy to find—and as a photographer, it is very natural for me to find a good angle to show its beauty. and beauty is never without a story behind.

as a photographer, i immediately feel if something should be the subject of my entries in exhibits. but the thing is, what i'm finding is a 'someone', not a 'something'.

i also feel fond for almost everything, so i can literally make everyone see a story behind--but what my heart yearns today was something a bit more specific, a bit of something that i find really hard to work with, and a bit more complicated to handle.

a person.

the thing is, if there's such a photographer that's called an 'object and definitely not a person photographer', that would be me.

maybe it's because i'm extremely, definitely, visibly awkward about working with other people that made me think of this to myself.

it's not that i don't talk to people. i talk to my parents all the time, to my half-assed sibling, Dabin, and to my friends that are actually patient enough to put up with me.

i tried reaching out to other people aside from them, you know. but maybe it's because of my cold—according to my friends—eyes and demeanor that it made them cower in fear and decide that it was probably for the best to not talk to me.

but today will be different.

i sighed and looked at the people passing by. it was fall. no one seems to catch my attention.

i massaged my forehead.

i really do hope today would be different.

***

"aigoo, nancy! yes yes! i'll be going! shut your trap!" i screeched at nancy on the other line who was already ranting about how late i was. i could hear jooe scolding nancy to shut up.

for the record, i'm not usually tardy. i just really had a very reasonable reason coming in late for our weekly get-togethers.